Sorry for another extended hiatus, I have been busy starting my own legal consulting business. Check out www.rpslegalsolutions.com for more info on what I do during business hours. I am sure I will be blogging about the whole experience in the near future.
But, for today, it's all about recipes. My cousin Dina is getting married in January (whoo hoo) and a few of her closest friends and family hosted a shower for her this past weekend. Because I am a control freak and would like to spend all my time in the kitchen if possible, I made all the snacks. I promised to share the recipes with all the girls, and figured the other half-a-dozen people that read my blog wouldn't mind them, either ;). I would refer you to my earlier recipes for chicken meatballs, tomato sauce and chicken curry for those of you looking to make the warm dishes I served on Saturday.
Jalapeno Popper Dip (esp. for Jinal):
I got this one off of Allrecipes.com and I have to credit the original creator---this dip was a huge hit and was so easy to make. I served it with tortilla chips, but bagel chips would be even better. I also think using the spread for tea sandwiches with some cucumber and tomato would be just lovely.
Ingredients:
8 oz cream cheese (I use reduced fat)
1 cup mayo (I also used reduced fat)
4 oz. chopped chilies (Old El Paso has 4 oz cans that you can find with the other Mexican food)
6-8 pickled jalapenos
Instructions:
Blend all the ingredients until they are smooth. Spread the dip into a 9x13 pan and bake, uncovered, for 30 minutes at 375 degrees. If you want to use the mix for sandwiches or bagels, skip the baking and spread on toasted bread.
Salsa (for Jigna and Komal):
My aunt is an awesome cook and for years, her semi-homemade salsa has been a family favorite. As a housewarming present, she bought me a Cuisinart and I am now finally capable of making an almost-as-good equivalent. This keeps really well and its a tasty addition to just about any TexMex menu or party.
Ingredients:
1 can 28 oz diced tomatoes (unsalted)
2 cloves garlic
2 oz pickled jalapenos (vary depending on desired heat)
1/2 a large sweet onion or one med sweet onion
juice of one lime
cilantro (I just eyeball it, but approx 4 tbs, roughly chopped)
rough ground black pepper and sea salt for seasoning
Directions:
Place all ingredients into food processor and chop until desired consistency is reached. Season according to taste and refrigerate.
Pizza Dip:
This is also an Allrecipe gem---its so good and tastes even better the next day. I think its a great addition to a Super Bowl party or just for Sunday snacking.
Ingredients:
16 oz cream cheese, I use reduced fat
dry basil, parsley, oregano and crushed red pepper
1 to 1 1/2 cup pizza sauce (or homemade tomato sauce, see earlier recipe)
1 cup Parmesan cheese
diced red bell peppers, onions, olives, and any of your favorite pizza toppings
Directions:
Blend cream cheese and dried herbs. Place on the bottom of a oven-safe tray, then add pizza sauce and toppings. Finish off with the Parmesan cheese. Bake, uncovered, for 30 minutes at 375 degrees. Serve with pita chips, baguette or crackers.
Beer-Cheese Dip (for Komal to try, post December 30):
My cousin is 8 1/2 months pregnant and was told, under no uncertain circumstances, that she was to avoid this dip. The beer in it is negligible, but I don't ever want it to be said that I served a pregnant lady beer ;) This tastes great with steak fries, regular potato chips or served on top of potato skins.
Ingredients:
9 0z lager--the full bodied and richer, the better
14 oz sharp cheddar cheese
1 cup Parmesan cheese
salt and pepper to taste
Directions:
Blend all ingredients in a food processor until smooth. Refrigerate until its time to serve.
I hope you enjoy these quick snack suggestions. I have more recipes, anecdotes and ideas to come, until then, happy snacking!!
Monday, November 16, 2009
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Happy Birthday to my husband!!!
Today is my husband's birthday. . .Happy Birthday, Chetan!
It also happens to be the anniversary of our legal/court wedding ceremony. Most Hindu priests in this area are not authorized/licensed to complete wedding certificates, so its not uncommon for Hindu couples to have a justice of the peace marry them sometime before the religious nuptials. In our case, we did at City Hall in Philadelphia on Chetan's birthday, which was also the one year anniversary of our first date!
I am putting together additional recipes and suggestions for a longer post tomorrow, so stay tuned. I couldn't let such a special day go by without sharing it and telling my husband I consider July 22nd to the be best day of the year, every year ;)
It also happens to be the anniversary of our legal/court wedding ceremony. Most Hindu priests in this area are not authorized/licensed to complete wedding certificates, so its not uncommon for Hindu couples to have a justice of the peace marry them sometime before the religious nuptials. In our case, we did at City Hall in Philadelphia on Chetan's birthday, which was also the one year anniversary of our first date!
I am putting together additional recipes and suggestions for a longer post tomorrow, so stay tuned. I couldn't let such a special day go by without sharing it and telling my husband I consider July 22nd to the be best day of the year, every year ;)
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
Recipe: Chili Lime Simmer Sauce for Chicken/Pork
If you have ever had spicy pulled chicken or pork tacos with onions, cilantro and a little cheese, you know just how heavenly they are. Here is a recipe I put together for simmering chicken and it should work for pork or a really hearty white fish as well. For best results, you really should make this with a cast iron pot or even a slow cooker. If you go the slow cooker route, make the sauce in a sautee pan and add with chicken, 1 cup chicken stock and let cook until the meat falls of the bone.
Ingredients:
1 tsp cumin seeds
1 med red onion, finely chopped
1 jalapeno, seeded if you want less spicy
6 cloves garlic, finely chopped or minced
1/2 cup fresh squeezed lime juice
1/4 cup fresh squeezed lemon juice
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 tbsp tomato paste
1 tbsp chili powder--i f you have a smoked chipotle chili powder, add a pinch for the smoky flavor
1 tsp oregano flakes
1 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp onion powder
1 tsp cumin powder
1 tbsp black pepper
a pinch of cayenne pepper
kosher salt to taste
1 lb skinless chicken legs and thighs
Directions:
Over medium heat, coat the bottom of the pan with olive oil. Once hot, brown cumin seeds (about a 1 min) and then add garlic, onions and jalapeno. Sautee until onions are clear (3-5 mins). Add tomato paste, lime and lemon juice and the seasoning. Bring mixture to a simmer and allow it to thicken, then add chicken. Coat the chicken completely with the mixture and then cook, over low heat, for 45 minutes with the lid closed, stirring occasionally. Cook until the onion "sweat" or water rises to the top (its almost like you are making a curry from a paste) and then pull the chicken off the bone to serve.
I would serve the chicken with corn tortillas, raw onions, cilantro, fresh jalapenos, sour cream and a little cheese.
Ingredients:
1 tsp cumin seeds
1 med red onion, finely chopped
1 jalapeno, seeded if you want less spicy
6 cloves garlic, finely chopped or minced
1/2 cup fresh squeezed lime juice
1/4 cup fresh squeezed lemon juice
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 tbsp tomato paste
1 tbsp chili powder--i f you have a smoked chipotle chili powder, add a pinch for the smoky flavor
1 tsp oregano flakes
1 tsp garlic powder
1/2 tsp onion powder
1 tsp cumin powder
1 tbsp black pepper
a pinch of cayenne pepper
kosher salt to taste
1 lb skinless chicken legs and thighs
Directions:
Over medium heat, coat the bottom of the pan with olive oil. Once hot, brown cumin seeds (about a 1 min) and then add garlic, onions and jalapeno. Sautee until onions are clear (3-5 mins). Add tomato paste, lime and lemon juice and the seasoning. Bring mixture to a simmer and allow it to thicken, then add chicken. Coat the chicken completely with the mixture and then cook, over low heat, for 45 minutes with the lid closed, stirring occasionally. Cook until the onion "sweat" or water rises to the top (its almost like you are making a curry from a paste) and then pull the chicken off the bone to serve.
I would serve the chicken with corn tortillas, raw onions, cilantro, fresh jalapenos, sour cream and a little cheese.
Monday, July 20, 2009
Product of our environments
I like a glass of wine or an ice cold beer at the end of the day. It helps me unwind and relax. But, years of binge drinking has somehow made it difficult for me to just have one when in a social environment.
This past weekend, we visited friends in DC. We had an incredible time hanging out with people we don't get to see often in order to celebrate a friend's birthday and to just enjoy summer in DC. Of course, we had a few drinks along the way. I did not actually get tipsy at on any given occasion, but I also never just had one beer. At one point on Saturday night, we were playing drinking games and I realized, during an incredibly rousing game of Taboo, that I had drank three beers and had successfully made myself dehydrated, bloated and sleepy all at the the same time. I then wished I had passed on the calories, carbonation and alcohol so as to keep my mind keener for what had turned into the most trash-talk filled board game night in recent memory.
One friend is about to wrap up his time in DC and leave for a fellowship in India. I said something about my general discomfort over seemingly drinking for no reason and asked him what he would do about drinking during his year in a dry part of the country. He responded that he will just give up drinking and probably wouldn't pick it up when he got back because "we are all just a product of our environment." I thought about that convo the whole way back to Philly, after having three Coronas at the waterfront, and realized I need to make a change in my drinking culture.
In college, we started as novice drinkers and drank for courage, to fit in, to lower our inhibitions, and probably because that's just what you do in college. My friends and I all drank, but I wouldn't say we were the biggest drinkers. Two of us shared a fake id, so we had easier access to the bars and definitely took advantage of that one or two nights a week, but I don't know if we ever really drank 5 nights a week like some of our college counterparts. But, we did definitely drink to feel it and I don't think I ever had one or two beer nights in college on purpose.
In grad school, we drank because grad school SUCKED and cut us off from the other non-grad students in our lives. I think we also drank to escape the constant stress and realization that the real world was only a few years and a couple hundred thousand dollars of debt away. Again, I don't think we ever drank more than once or a twice a week and I was certainly too poor to have a glass of wine in the evenings. I stuck to cheap draft beer on special at the various "bar reviews" set up by the law school and drank to feel it every time!
In the working world, I think a lot of my peers brought the binge-drinking-as-therapy coping mechanism to the law firms as there was certainly a great deal of binge drinking in the early years. And, like college, we were thrust into new environments, looking to make friends and meet people, so we reverted back to how we handled that the last time: the liquid courage and escape a six pack/handle/bottle of wine always seems to promise at the beginning of the night, even though it usually only delivers hangovers, embarrassment and one-time-when-I-was-drunk stories the next day.
But now, I think we drink because that's just what we know how to do. I don't think any of my friends have a substance abuse problem (though there are a few who are super bad drunks and probably should never drink again, some may include me in this group), but I do think we all have a drinking problem in that we don't know how to just have a drink and to enjoy the alcohol. And I think Robin is right, we are all just products of our environment. I never put much stock in all the talk that Americans are irresponsible drinkers because we don't learn how to drink earlier and pick up binge drinking from our culture. I spent enough time in other countries to see that binge drinking is part of youth culture throughout the Western world. But, I do think my alcohol consumption is definitely a learned habit, brought about after years of participating in a binge drinking culture. While I think I enjoyed the drinking culture immensely, I may be reaching a point in my life, especially because of my health, where I need re-evaluate intense consumption. I no longer drink liquor (oh, how I miss margaritas) and the amount of beer or wine one needs to drink after years of binge drinking to continue to reach the "perfect buzz" is often staggering in terms of calories, cost and the sheer time it takes to drink that much. I am also happier now, which may eliminate the need to drink at times---though most of my friends seem pretty happy to me and I wonder if they would still be if they didn't drink. Generally, I wonder when, if ever, we will outgrow it and just be able to a have a drink or two because we enjoy it and not because its a means to a drunken end of the night. I am going to try to cut back, as soon as Chet's birthday week and wedding season and our anniversary pass of course. . .oh, wait . . .
This past weekend, we visited friends in DC. We had an incredible time hanging out with people we don't get to see often in order to celebrate a friend's birthday and to just enjoy summer in DC. Of course, we had a few drinks along the way. I did not actually get tipsy at on any given occasion, but I also never just had one beer. At one point on Saturday night, we were playing drinking games and I realized, during an incredibly rousing game of Taboo, that I had drank three beers and had successfully made myself dehydrated, bloated and sleepy all at the the same time. I then wished I had passed on the calories, carbonation and alcohol so as to keep my mind keener for what had turned into the most trash-talk filled board game night in recent memory.
One friend is about to wrap up his time in DC and leave for a fellowship in India. I said something about my general discomfort over seemingly drinking for no reason and asked him what he would do about drinking during his year in a dry part of the country. He responded that he will just give up drinking and probably wouldn't pick it up when he got back because "we are all just a product of our environment." I thought about that convo the whole way back to Philly, after having three Coronas at the waterfront, and realized I need to make a change in my drinking culture.
In college, we started as novice drinkers and drank for courage, to fit in, to lower our inhibitions, and probably because that's just what you do in college. My friends and I all drank, but I wouldn't say we were the biggest drinkers. Two of us shared a fake id, so we had easier access to the bars and definitely took advantage of that one or two nights a week, but I don't know if we ever really drank 5 nights a week like some of our college counterparts. But, we did definitely drink to feel it and I don't think I ever had one or two beer nights in college on purpose.
In grad school, we drank because grad school SUCKED and cut us off from the other non-grad students in our lives. I think we also drank to escape the constant stress and realization that the real world was only a few years and a couple hundred thousand dollars of debt away. Again, I don't think we ever drank more than once or a twice a week and I was certainly too poor to have a glass of wine in the evenings. I stuck to cheap draft beer on special at the various "bar reviews" set up by the law school and drank to feel it every time!
In the working world, I think a lot of my peers brought the binge-drinking-as-therapy coping mechanism to the law firms as there was certainly a great deal of binge drinking in the early years. And, like college, we were thrust into new environments, looking to make friends and meet people, so we reverted back to how we handled that the last time: the liquid courage and escape a six pack/handle/bottle of wine always seems to promise at the beginning of the night, even though it usually only delivers hangovers, embarrassment and one-time-when-I-was-drunk stories the next day.
But now, I think we drink because that's just what we know how to do. I don't think any of my friends have a substance abuse problem (though there are a few who are super bad drunks and probably should never drink again, some may include me in this group), but I do think we all have a drinking problem in that we don't know how to just have a drink and to enjoy the alcohol. And I think Robin is right, we are all just products of our environment. I never put much stock in all the talk that Americans are irresponsible drinkers because we don't learn how to drink earlier and pick up binge drinking from our culture. I spent enough time in other countries to see that binge drinking is part of youth culture throughout the Western world. But, I do think my alcohol consumption is definitely a learned habit, brought about after years of participating in a binge drinking culture. While I think I enjoyed the drinking culture immensely, I may be reaching a point in my life, especially because of my health, where I need re-evaluate intense consumption. I no longer drink liquor (oh, how I miss margaritas) and the amount of beer or wine one needs to drink after years of binge drinking to continue to reach the "perfect buzz" is often staggering in terms of calories, cost and the sheer time it takes to drink that much. I am also happier now, which may eliminate the need to drink at times---though most of my friends seem pretty happy to me and I wonder if they would still be if they didn't drink. Generally, I wonder when, if ever, we will outgrow it and just be able to a have a drink or two because we enjoy it and not because its a means to a drunken end of the night. I am going to try to cut back, as soon as Chet's birthday week and wedding season and our anniversary pass of course. . .oh, wait . . .
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Back to it
Sorry for the long lapse between posts, now that things have for real settled down, I am hoping to get back to regular posts.
Since I last posted, I quit my job as a litigation associate and am officially a recovering lawyer. Email me if you are in the same position (either voluntarily or involuntarily), I would love to hear how you are spending your days!!!
So, why did I quit? I guess it was a combination of never really liking what I did, the soul sucking environment that is biglaw and my current health woes. Despite my serious discontent with the practice of law and the legal community, I didn't actually make the decision easily. It took some gut-wrenching conversations and lots of tears and assurances from my husband, family and friends that it would actually be okay if I quit and that the world would not come to a screeching halt if I ceased to be a slave to the billable hour.
Its been a little over a month since I quit. I have spent the time marveling at how quickly my professional situation snowballed such that I was left with no choice but to quit. I have also realized why actually quitting (as opposed to just whining and moaning about how I was being stifled and wanted out so badly) was so difficult for me. For 7 years, being a lawyer gave me an identity, an easy entrance into a network and community and of course, it paid well (which is certainly no longer the case thanks to the market). I decided I wanted to be a lawyer when I was just a kid and it was a fairly lofty and abstract goal to work towards for most of my childhood and adolescence. My only rational in choosing the law was that I liked to read, write and argue. I didn't know then that about 5% of a litigator's time is spent actually practicing law and the other 95% is spent on BS so that you can justify exorbitant bills to your clients.
I started law school at 22 and had no idea what life was all about. So, when I kept hearing that young associates have to "pay their dues" and work away for the first 6-8years in order to reach the golden kingdom of partnership, it all seemed manageable to me. I mean, I was used to being a poor student and feeling there were never enough hours in the day to get things done already---it couldn't be that much harder in the real world, right? Besides, the firms pay a lot of money, so they must expect you to do some real work, too. . . .Oh, how naive I was!!!
Turned out, the brass ring was totally overrated. Very few people ever make it to partner and even fewer women. Most of my counterparts were single and struggling with dating because their schedules didn't allow them to meet people and develop new relationships. Many had serious substance abuse problems and anger management issues. In short, the profession was just as screwed up as John Grisham makes it out to be. Still, it took me a while to admit it to myself, much less others---even when I realized the profession wasn't all that I hoped, I still enjoyed the feeling of status and worth that came along with having a "traditional" profession. I also didn't want to admit I had made a mistake and honestly, I didn't think I had anything to replace it with. I was single, with many friends and a great family, but everyone else in my life was doing what they needed to do and I thought practicing law was the thing I should be doing. Mentors, professors, friends had long told me I would reach a point in my life where my priorities would suddenly change and I would just walk away, but I was pretty skeptical and figured I would somehow drag myself to the partner-line.
And then, one day in July of 2007, my priorities did suddenly change. I found the love of my life and my bestest friend. Practicing law didn't seem like what I should be doing, it took a backseat to falling in love and getting married and building a home and a life with Chet. And I was really happy---so happy in fact that I actually forgot how much I hated my job and figured with everything else in life finally in place, I could definitely overlook hating my job, right?
Wrong!!! Yes, my personal life was good, but my health continued to deteriorate and despite KNOWING the stress of billing and not billing was taking away from my quality of life, I just didn't have the courage to quit. I was totally paralyzed. I forgot that I actually know how to do other things and that 99.9999% of the world's population does not in fact practice law, nor do they give a crap if I was working for a big law firm. In fact, no one besides other lawyers even understood what I did, much less care where I did it. Finally, I simply lost the physical ability to work and had no choice but to quit.
It took a few weeks after my last day for the big-so-what, my take-away or the big answer to my existential crisis to finally occur to me: I like being a lawyer, I have always liked being a lawyer and I will always be a lawyer---I just didn't like firm life and no one was keeping me there but me. So that was it. After years of agonizing over hating my job and feeling guilty for hating my job and the constant back and forth about leaving or staying, I just allowed myself to say firm life isn't for me and moved on. And now, I enjoy the law again. I follow what's going on in the courts and around the industry because I care and not because I feel like I have to. I re-discovered some of my other professional abilities and am opening my own business and am content and happy with where all the parts of my life are going. It's certainly not easy, but it's totally worth it and I am glad it took me this long to get here---I don't know if I would appreciate it otherwise.
Since I last posted, I quit my job as a litigation associate and am officially a recovering lawyer. Email me if you are in the same position (either voluntarily or involuntarily), I would love to hear how you are spending your days!!!
So, why did I quit? I guess it was a combination of never really liking what I did, the soul sucking environment that is biglaw and my current health woes. Despite my serious discontent with the practice of law and the legal community, I didn't actually make the decision easily. It took some gut-wrenching conversations and lots of tears and assurances from my husband, family and friends that it would actually be okay if I quit and that the world would not come to a screeching halt if I ceased to be a slave to the billable hour.
Its been a little over a month since I quit. I have spent the time marveling at how quickly my professional situation snowballed such that I was left with no choice but to quit. I have also realized why actually quitting (as opposed to just whining and moaning about how I was being stifled and wanted out so badly) was so difficult for me. For 7 years, being a lawyer gave me an identity, an easy entrance into a network and community and of course, it paid well (which is certainly no longer the case thanks to the market). I decided I wanted to be a lawyer when I was just a kid and it was a fairly lofty and abstract goal to work towards for most of my childhood and adolescence. My only rational in choosing the law was that I liked to read, write and argue. I didn't know then that about 5% of a litigator's time is spent actually practicing law and the other 95% is spent on BS so that you can justify exorbitant bills to your clients.
I started law school at 22 and had no idea what life was all about. So, when I kept hearing that young associates have to "pay their dues" and work away for the first 6-8years in order to reach the golden kingdom of partnership, it all seemed manageable to me. I mean, I was used to being a poor student and feeling there were never enough hours in the day to get things done already---it couldn't be that much harder in the real world, right? Besides, the firms pay a lot of money, so they must expect you to do some real work, too. . . .Oh, how naive I was!!!
Turned out, the brass ring was totally overrated. Very few people ever make it to partner and even fewer women. Most of my counterparts were single and struggling with dating because their schedules didn't allow them to meet people and develop new relationships. Many had serious substance abuse problems and anger management issues. In short, the profession was just as screwed up as John Grisham makes it out to be. Still, it took me a while to admit it to myself, much less others---even when I realized the profession wasn't all that I hoped, I still enjoyed the feeling of status and worth that came along with having a "traditional" profession. I also didn't want to admit I had made a mistake and honestly, I didn't think I had anything to replace it with. I was single, with many friends and a great family, but everyone else in my life was doing what they needed to do and I thought practicing law was the thing I should be doing. Mentors, professors, friends had long told me I would reach a point in my life where my priorities would suddenly change and I would just walk away, but I was pretty skeptical and figured I would somehow drag myself to the partner-line.
And then, one day in July of 2007, my priorities did suddenly change. I found the love of my life and my bestest friend. Practicing law didn't seem like what I should be doing, it took a backseat to falling in love and getting married and building a home and a life with Chet. And I was really happy---so happy in fact that I actually forgot how much I hated my job and figured with everything else in life finally in place, I could definitely overlook hating my job, right?
Wrong!!! Yes, my personal life was good, but my health continued to deteriorate and despite KNOWING the stress of billing and not billing was taking away from my quality of life, I just didn't have the courage to quit. I was totally paralyzed. I forgot that I actually know how to do other things and that 99.9999% of the world's population does not in fact practice law, nor do they give a crap if I was working for a big law firm. In fact, no one besides other lawyers even understood what I did, much less care where I did it. Finally, I simply lost the physical ability to work and had no choice but to quit.
It took a few weeks after my last day for the big-so-what, my take-away or the big answer to my existential crisis to finally occur to me: I like being a lawyer, I have always liked being a lawyer and I will always be a lawyer---I just didn't like firm life and no one was keeping me there but me. So that was it. After years of agonizing over hating my job and feeling guilty for hating my job and the constant back and forth about leaving or staying, I just allowed myself to say firm life isn't for me and moved on. And now, I enjoy the law again. I follow what's going on in the courts and around the industry because I care and not because I feel like I have to. I re-discovered some of my other professional abilities and am opening my own business and am content and happy with where all the parts of my life are going. It's certainly not easy, but it's totally worth it and I am glad it took me this long to get here---I don't know if I would appreciate it otherwise.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Seriously Ryan O'Neal?
Talk about a major a-hole, Ryan O'Neal REALLY takes the cake. For days now, both he and his meth-head son have been going on and on about Farah Fawcett's illness and the effects its having on them. If I have to see one more interview like this or read about how hard it is for O'Neal to "lost the love of his life," I may scream. Who cares how you feel about it? She is the one with cancer, not you. And her cancer doesn't exonerate either of you for your egregious behavior.
Let's not forget that O'Neal is the same dad-of-the-year who took his then 10 year old daughter, Tatum, to Studio 54 and gave her alcohol and drugs because he thought it was cute. He also allegedly had sex with the then underage Melanie Griffith, Tatum's best friend, when he was supposed to be chaperoning their summer trip in Europe. The police have been to his home on several occasions due to claims of drug-fueled violence between him and his grown son and his son's girfriend. He was also recently arrested, at 68!, for possession of chrystal meth, a drug his 18 year old son with Fawcett is also alleged to have in his possession. Ryan O'Neal is clearly a troubled individual with zero parenting skills and has been known more for his antics in the past 30 years than his acting. The fact that he is now using his former lover's illness to get back in the spotlight and to try to gain public sympathy is just wrong.
I recognize that Ryan O'Neal and Farah Fawcett had a long and complicated relationship and I for one am in no position to judge why or how she could ever have possibly loved him. But, the merits of their relationship aside, the way he has been carrying on since news first broke of the escalation of her cancer (which oh-so-conveniently coincided with his latest brush with the law) is just appalling! Their son Redmond apparently lied to a judge about her condition to receive a special release from jail--really people? Do you really have no scruples, at all??? How can you say you love a person and then use them for your own personal gain? While Ryan has been giving interviews to anyone who will listen, Farah has asked the media to respect her dignity and right to privacy as she goes through these difficult times. How can O'Neal fail to respect her wishes, which according to his own interviews may very well be her last requests?
I wish Farah Fawcett comfort and peace as she faces her battle with cancer and respect her immensely for speaking out about a rarely discussed illness in hopes to prevent others from facing the same battle. I am sure many more men and women will be more proactive about testing for anal cancer thanks to her courage and honesty. I wish the media would ignore Ryan O'Neal's constant sound bites and obvious efforts to milk this situation for press and respect Ms. Fawcett's request for privacy during this time. And, I hope both Ryan and his son Redmond seek professional help for their addictions and redeem themselves before she passes away---it would be a shame if they couldn't at least do that for her.
Let's not forget that O'Neal is the same dad-of-the-year who took his then 10 year old daughter, Tatum, to Studio 54 and gave her alcohol and drugs because he thought it was cute. He also allegedly had sex with the then underage Melanie Griffith, Tatum's best friend, when he was supposed to be chaperoning their summer trip in Europe. The police have been to his home on several occasions due to claims of drug-fueled violence between him and his grown son and his son's girfriend. He was also recently arrested, at 68!, for possession of chrystal meth, a drug his 18 year old son with Fawcett is also alleged to have in his possession. Ryan O'Neal is clearly a troubled individual with zero parenting skills and has been known more for his antics in the past 30 years than his acting. The fact that he is now using his former lover's illness to get back in the spotlight and to try to gain public sympathy is just wrong.
I recognize that Ryan O'Neal and Farah Fawcett had a long and complicated relationship and I for one am in no position to judge why or how she could ever have possibly loved him. But, the merits of their relationship aside, the way he has been carrying on since news first broke of the escalation of her cancer (which oh-so-conveniently coincided with his latest brush with the law) is just appalling! Their son Redmond apparently lied to a judge about her condition to receive a special release from jail--really people? Do you really have no scruples, at all??? How can you say you love a person and then use them for your own personal gain? While Ryan has been giving interviews to anyone who will listen, Farah has asked the media to respect her dignity and right to privacy as she goes through these difficult times. How can O'Neal fail to respect her wishes, which according to his own interviews may very well be her last requests?
I wish Farah Fawcett comfort and peace as she faces her battle with cancer and respect her immensely for speaking out about a rarely discussed illness in hopes to prevent others from facing the same battle. I am sure many more men and women will be more proactive about testing for anal cancer thanks to her courage and honesty. I wish the media would ignore Ryan O'Neal's constant sound bites and obvious efforts to milk this situation for press and respect Ms. Fawcett's request for privacy during this time. And, I hope both Ryan and his son Redmond seek professional help for their addictions and redeem themselves before she passes away---it would be a shame if they couldn't at least do that for her.
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
The John and Kate Saga: Further proof that Americans are haters of love
Unless you live under a rock, you have probably heard a great deal about Jon and Kate Gosselin and their marital problems. And, unless you can handle the shrill screaming of 6 4-year olds and lots of eye-rolling and bitchiness, you probably don't watch Jon and Kate plus Eight often. (As a related aside, my 12 year old sister is obsessed with the show b/c she thinks the little kids are cute, but my family collectively begs her not to watch the "baby show" in the living room because the show stresses us out.)
Anyway, it seems that another reality show couple is about to go bust. And this time, it's a couple made famous on a reality show about raising a large family with the intended message that you have to have good morals and family values to make it work. Yet, the same couple that quoted scripture to one another during a lavish [free] vow renewal at the posh Mau'i resort where my husband and I paid an arm and a leg to honeymoon is facing allegations that both have been unfaithful and are estranged, despite renewing the show for another season. It looks like the Gosselins are about the join an illustrious list, including Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson, Shanna Moakler and Travis Barker, Hulk Hogan and his wife Linda, Dave Navarro and Carmen Electra, Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston, Katie Price and Peter Andre . . .and on and on. With the exception of the Osbournes (who faced their own fair share of post-show media and public bashing), it seems like any couple that signs on to have cameras enter their home and follow them around is doomed to fail.
Of course they are!!! Can you imagine if there was a cameraman in your house, 24/7, allowed to tape everything and anything except for bathrooms and nocturnal activities? The odds of them taping cringe-worthy moments AND editing the episodes to highlight those specific gaffes are not in your favor. Why? Because Americans love to watch couples implode on television. We are a bunch of haters!
It makes sense, if you think about it. Who wants to watch a sickeningly cute, functional couple or family on reality television? Why would a country, in which slightly more than 50% of marriages end in divorce, possibly want to be reminded that some couples do make it work and can have a respectful, fulfilling relationship? Don't get me wrong, we love these reality couples at first---remember how Jessica Simpson's "career" took off after the first season of Newlyweds? Or how people thought the Hulk and Linda were such "good" parents to Nick and Brooke the first season? But, as Jerry Springer has taught us all, normal and nice don't get ratings. Nasty, dysfunctional and ridiculous certainly do.
Americans are inherently haters of love---we want others to be as miserable in their marriages/relationships as we are in ours. Sure, people will tell you they watch Jon and Kate because the sextuplets are so cute (which I am loathe to admit, is definitely true) and that may be why they initially tuned in. But, after a while, cute sextuplets get kind of old and the viewer's attention turns to how many ways Kate can find to completely belittle Jon's abilities as a father and a husband in one episode. At from what I can tell, she is constantly finding new ways to make Jon look like an idiot, on the show and in her interviews. And, the crazier shit gets, the baser the interactions and exchanges, the more people will watch. It makes us feel better to know that these couples have to pay a price for fame and money---their marriages. And, I think it makes average Americans feel superior and we ultimately judge them by saying, " What did they expect? They put themselves out there, of course we will judge their qualities as individuals and as a family! How dare they ask for privacy during their relationship woes? Don't they know by commodifying themselves, they have lost all rights to personal dignity in the wake of a break up?"
And I am not completely sure that we are wrong in reveling in their demise. I mean, look, when Jessica and Nick broke up, it was a real shock and a first. But any couple that has tried their hand at the reality-show-about-the-couple-or-family concept can't say that they haven't been warned. What makes anyone think that they won't become a statistic or that they are somehow better equipped at seeing all the bad aspects of themselves shown OVER and OVER again on cable television? Obviously, such people do in fact exist and as long as they do, we can all relax knowing no matter how bad our lives are, cable television will continue provide us with some crazy shitshow of a relationship to make us feel better.
Anyway, it seems that another reality show couple is about to go bust. And this time, it's a couple made famous on a reality show about raising a large family with the intended message that you have to have good morals and family values to make it work. Yet, the same couple that quoted scripture to one another during a lavish [free] vow renewal at the posh Mau'i resort where my husband and I paid an arm and a leg to honeymoon is facing allegations that both have been unfaithful and are estranged, despite renewing the show for another season. It looks like the Gosselins are about the join an illustrious list, including Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson, Shanna Moakler and Travis Barker, Hulk Hogan and his wife Linda, Dave Navarro and Carmen Electra, Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston, Katie Price and Peter Andre . . .and on and on. With the exception of the Osbournes (who faced their own fair share of post-show media and public bashing), it seems like any couple that signs on to have cameras enter their home and follow them around is doomed to fail.
Of course they are!!! Can you imagine if there was a cameraman in your house, 24/7, allowed to tape everything and anything except for bathrooms and nocturnal activities? The odds of them taping cringe-worthy moments AND editing the episodes to highlight those specific gaffes are not in your favor. Why? Because Americans love to watch couples implode on television. We are a bunch of haters!
It makes sense, if you think about it. Who wants to watch a sickeningly cute, functional couple or family on reality television? Why would a country, in which slightly more than 50% of marriages end in divorce, possibly want to be reminded that some couples do make it work and can have a respectful, fulfilling relationship? Don't get me wrong, we love these reality couples at first---remember how Jessica Simpson's "career" took off after the first season of Newlyweds? Or how people thought the Hulk and Linda were such "good" parents to Nick and Brooke the first season? But, as Jerry Springer has taught us all, normal and nice don't get ratings. Nasty, dysfunctional and ridiculous certainly do.
Americans are inherently haters of love---we want others to be as miserable in their marriages/relationships as we are in ours. Sure, people will tell you they watch Jon and Kate because the sextuplets are so cute (which I am loathe to admit, is definitely true) and that may be why they initially tuned in. But, after a while, cute sextuplets get kind of old and the viewer's attention turns to how many ways Kate can find to completely belittle Jon's abilities as a father and a husband in one episode. At from what I can tell, she is constantly finding new ways to make Jon look like an idiot, on the show and in her interviews. And, the crazier shit gets, the baser the interactions and exchanges, the more people will watch. It makes us feel better to know that these couples have to pay a price for fame and money---their marriages. And, I think it makes average Americans feel superior and we ultimately judge them by saying, " What did they expect? They put themselves out there, of course we will judge their qualities as individuals and as a family! How dare they ask for privacy during their relationship woes? Don't they know by commodifying themselves, they have lost all rights to personal dignity in the wake of a break up?"
And I am not completely sure that we are wrong in reveling in their demise. I mean, look, when Jessica and Nick broke up, it was a real shock and a first. But any couple that has tried their hand at the reality-show-about-the-couple-or-family concept can't say that they haven't been warned. What makes anyone think that they won't become a statistic or that they are somehow better equipped at seeing all the bad aspects of themselves shown OVER and OVER again on cable television? Obviously, such people do in fact exist and as long as they do, we can all relax knowing no matter how bad our lives are, cable television will continue provide us with some crazy shitshow of a relationship to make us feel better.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Homemade Enchilada Sauce
So, being home for an extended period time definitely has its advantages. One is time to actually make things from scratch. For years, my mom (and most Indian women of her generation I know) has used Old El Paso Enchilada sauce. Though I like it the sauce well enough, it always tastes a little tin-y and not nearly as fresh as the stuff I get at the local tacqueria.
I haven't experimented with tomatillos yet to make enchiladas verdes, but I have found yet another way to utilize canned tomatoes (okay, so they aren't COMPLETELY made from scratch) in making fairly decent sauce. The recipe is below, let me know what you think.
Ingredients:
1 28 oz. can, petite diced tomatoes
1 small sweet onion, finely chopped
3 cloves garlic
1 medium jalapeno (seeded if you like a milder flavor)
1 small chipotle pepper, softened and seeded
1 lime
cumin powder
dried oregano
salt
black pepper
Directions:
Soak the dried chipotle in one cup warm water for about 30 minutes, or until softened. Remove the seeds (they are TOO hot), and finely chop. Reserve the water.
Coat the bottom of the pot with olive oil over medium heat. Add the onions and sautee until clear. Add garlic and chopped jalapeno and cook until garlic turns a nice brown. Then add the can of tomatoes, plus the water from the chipotle and the diced chipotle and bring the entire mixture to a simmer.
Then add 1 tbsp cumin, 1 tbsp dried oregano flakes, course black pepper and salt to taste. Allow the mixture to continue to simmer for about 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Finally, add the juice of one lime and puree the mixture with a hand held blender or food processor. You can add a little more water to thin out the sauce, if necessary. Run through a sieve to remove any remaining pieces of chipotle which do not blend and allow the sauce to cool. It can keep up to a week in a glass jar.
We like our sauce a little thicker, but for those of you who like a thinner sauce, I recommend adding a little more lime juice and an extra 1/2 cup of water before blending.
Enjoy!
I haven't experimented with tomatillos yet to make enchiladas verdes, but I have found yet another way to utilize canned tomatoes (okay, so they aren't COMPLETELY made from scratch) in making fairly decent sauce. The recipe is below, let me know what you think.
Ingredients:
1 28 oz. can, petite diced tomatoes
1 small sweet onion, finely chopped
3 cloves garlic
1 medium jalapeno (seeded if you like a milder flavor)
1 small chipotle pepper, softened and seeded
1 lime
cumin powder
dried oregano
salt
black pepper
Directions:
Soak the dried chipotle in one cup warm water for about 30 minutes, or until softened. Remove the seeds (they are TOO hot), and finely chop. Reserve the water.
Coat the bottom of the pot with olive oil over medium heat. Add the onions and sautee until clear. Add garlic and chopped jalapeno and cook until garlic turns a nice brown. Then add the can of tomatoes, plus the water from the chipotle and the diced chipotle and bring the entire mixture to a simmer.
Then add 1 tbsp cumin, 1 tbsp dried oregano flakes, course black pepper and salt to taste. Allow the mixture to continue to simmer for about 20 minutes, stirring occasionally. Finally, add the juice of one lime and puree the mixture with a hand held blender or food processor. You can add a little more water to thin out the sauce, if necessary. Run through a sieve to remove any remaining pieces of chipotle which do not blend and allow the sauce to cool. It can keep up to a week in a glass jar.
We like our sauce a little thicker, but for those of you who like a thinner sauce, I recommend adding a little more lime juice and an extra 1/2 cup of water before blending.
Enjoy!
Back from an extended hiatus
Hello all! I am finally back from an extended hiatus . . .I was recently diagnosed with Fibro Myalgia and have been on leave since mid-March. I wasn't feeling so hot for a while and typing was (and still is from time to time) difficult. I haven't totally mastered the condition, but I am having more good days of late and I decided its time to get back to life. As things are slowly getting back in order, I am super excited about getting back to ranting and raving and sharing recipes and ideas with those of you who still check in every now and again.
More to come later today, for now, thanks for checking in!
More to come later today, for now, thanks for checking in!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Relating back to an earlier post on Rush Limbaugh...
...I guess someone from across the aisle agrees with me. Maybe instead of wanting President Obama to fail so much, Rush should consider doing something for his on-life-support, pretty-much-failed party.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Recipe: SW Chicken for tacos, quesadillas and enchiladas
Chet is from Texas and really misses Houston's taquerias and Tex-Mex restaurants. Though I am from Maryland, I, like all Indian people, share his love for all things SW, Tex-Mex, authentic Mexican, etc. And I really like margaritas ;)
We don't eat red meat in our house, but we do try to get our protein in everyday and the following recipe is one we make just about every week. This chicken recipe can be used for tacos, quesadillas and not-so-authentic enchiladas (I will pass along a recipe for those later) and freezes well, too. Its sort of a kitchen-sink recipe, so feel free to make substitutions on the vegetable and bean front. My cousin Purva asked I post this recipe as she is a big fan and is always calling me when she makes it at home because she invariably forgets an ingredient!
Ingredients:
1 lb ground chicken (you can use turkey, too)
1 can black beans, drained and washed
1 cup frozen corn kernels
1 cup of baby portabella mushrooms (any kind will do really)
1 red bell pepper
1 medium sweet onion
1 jalapeno (seed it if you don't like spice, if you like it hot, add an extra one and have some Corona handy!)
3-4 cloves of garlic
1 14 oz can diced tomatoes, no salt added
spices**:
2 tbsp cumin
1/2 tsp coriander (dried cilantro)
2 tbsp onion powder
2 tbsp chili powder
1 tbsp garlic powder
1 tsp black powder
1 tsp Mexican oregano (you can find this just about anywhere, but make sure its the Mexican variey, it just jives with these flavors better)
salt, to taste
a pinch of lime juice
optional: add a smoked adobe or chipotle pepper if you want a smokier, heavier flavor. Just soften dried chilis in water for 20-30 minutes, remove the seeds and add in with the remaining seasoning. I often fish the dry chilis out at the end to avoid any added heat, but to add the flavor.
** you can just use a taco seasoning packet or two if you have a brand you really like, but I prefer to add my own spices and season to taste. The ready made packs tend to have a lot of salt in them and can vary in freshness.
In a large skillet, sautee the onions, garlic and jalapenos over med heat until the onions are clear. Add the chicken and run a turner through the meat 2-3 times to break it up and turn it over frequently but avoid moving it around too much b/c it will get chewy/overcooked. Once the chicken is almost cooked, add the beans, corn, mushrooms, tomatoes and bell pepper. Allow the whole mixture to heat through at medium heat and add the spices. Cook for an additional 4 minutes, or until the beans are cooked all the way through and remove from the heat.
This mixture makes anywhere from 8-10 servings, depending on how you use it. Don't worry if you have left overs, just freeze them!!!
Also, I don't personally drain the nominal fat from the chicken or the tomatoes because I like the mixture to be saucy. You can of course drain the excess liquid as you cook, but the sauce will thicken after you remove the skillet from heat and will help keep the mixture juicy for use in quesadillas and enchiladas. Otherwise, the meat may dry out from baking and additional heat. It also allows for better freezing.
If you are a vegetarian, I suggest substituting the chicken for a can of pinto beans and a can of kidney beans. After you sautee the onions, garlic and jalapeno, add 1/2 cup of water and the three types of beans, rinsed and drained. Add a pinch of salt, as well. After about 3-4 minutes, run a turner through the mixture and give the beans a good "smash" if you like a softer mixture, add the remaining vegetables and follow the directions above.
We don't eat red meat in our house, but we do try to get our protein in everyday and the following recipe is one we make just about every week. This chicken recipe can be used for tacos, quesadillas and not-so-authentic enchiladas (I will pass along a recipe for those later) and freezes well, too. Its sort of a kitchen-sink recipe, so feel free to make substitutions on the vegetable and bean front. My cousin Purva asked I post this recipe as she is a big fan and is always calling me when she makes it at home because she invariably forgets an ingredient!
Ingredients:
1 lb ground chicken (you can use turkey, too)
1 can black beans, drained and washed
1 cup frozen corn kernels
1 cup of baby portabella mushrooms (any kind will do really)
1 red bell pepper
1 medium sweet onion
1 jalapeno (seed it if you don't like spice, if you like it hot, add an extra one and have some Corona handy!)
3-4 cloves of garlic
1 14 oz can diced tomatoes, no salt added
spices**:
2 tbsp cumin
1/2 tsp coriander (dried cilantro)
2 tbsp onion powder
2 tbsp chili powder
1 tbsp garlic powder
1 tsp black powder
1 tsp Mexican oregano (you can find this just about anywhere, but make sure its the Mexican variey, it just jives with these flavors better)
salt, to taste
a pinch of lime juice
optional: add a smoked adobe or chipotle pepper if you want a smokier, heavier flavor. Just soften dried chilis in water for 20-30 minutes, remove the seeds and add in with the remaining seasoning. I often fish the dry chilis out at the end to avoid any added heat, but to add the flavor.
** you can just use a taco seasoning packet or two if you have a brand you really like, but I prefer to add my own spices and season to taste. The ready made packs tend to have a lot of salt in them and can vary in freshness.
In a large skillet, sautee the onions, garlic and jalapenos over med heat until the onions are clear. Add the chicken and run a turner through the meat 2-3 times to break it up and turn it over frequently but avoid moving it around too much b/c it will get chewy/overcooked. Once the chicken is almost cooked, add the beans, corn, mushrooms, tomatoes and bell pepper. Allow the whole mixture to heat through at medium heat and add the spices. Cook for an additional 4 minutes, or until the beans are cooked all the way through and remove from the heat.
This mixture makes anywhere from 8-10 servings, depending on how you use it. Don't worry if you have left overs, just freeze them!!!
Also, I don't personally drain the nominal fat from the chicken or the tomatoes because I like the mixture to be saucy. You can of course drain the excess liquid as you cook, but the sauce will thicken after you remove the skillet from heat and will help keep the mixture juicy for use in quesadillas and enchiladas. Otherwise, the meat may dry out from baking and additional heat. It also allows for better freezing.
If you are a vegetarian, I suggest substituting the chicken for a can of pinto beans and a can of kidney beans. After you sautee the onions, garlic and jalapeno, add 1/2 cup of water and the three types of beans, rinsed and drained. Add a pinch of salt, as well. After about 3-4 minutes, run a turner through the mixture and give the beans a good "smash" if you like a softer mixture, add the remaining vegetables and follow the directions above.
Can someone please...
. . .remind Rush Limbaugh that he is NOT an elected official and therefore in NO position to tell Republican elected officials, or any elected official for that matter, what to do. He is a political commentator---so go ahead and comment Mr. Limbaugh, in your oxycontin-driven vitriolic stream of absurd, ugly (Mr. Steele's word, not mine) and nonsensical rants. But, keep the real thinking and decision making to those individuals we actually elected.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Open call and tidbits
If anyone knows someone at Entertainment Weekly, can you please tell them that I should write the weekly re-caps for Big Love?
Also, if anyone knows Marcie Turney, can you tell her I would like to work for her?
Also, if you have a fairy godmother, can you lend her to me and tell her I would like the LV Madeline in purple? With the wallet to match, please.
Also, this is an open call for contributions on the sports, travel and crafting front. People have been asking for more how-tos and meatier analysis, beyond my rants and raves that is.
Oh, and if anyone is looking for a good book, I recommend Amitav Ghosh's Sea of Poppies. AMAZING.
Also, if anyone knows Marcie Turney, can you tell her I would like to work for her?
Also, if you have a fairy godmother, can you lend her to me and tell her I would like the LV Madeline in purple? With the wallet to match, please.
Also, this is an open call for contributions on the sports, travel and crafting front. People have been asking for more how-tos and meatier analysis, beyond my rants and raves that is.
Oh, and if anyone is looking for a good book, I recommend Amitav Ghosh's Sea of Poppies. AMAZING.
Um...
. . .just because I am Indian does not mean I have to like Bobby Jindal. In fact, I have a strong dislike for Bobby Jindal. And it's not just because he is a TERRIBLE public speaker (see, e.g. last nights "rebuttal" to Barry-O's fake-me-out State of the Union) or because he is a hardcore conservative (and I am so obviously an uber liberal). I dislike him for the same reason I dislike Sarah Palin: I feel like the Republican party is thrusting him upon the American people in an effort to pander to minorities with no regard to the health and direction of the party. And I frankly find it offensive that they assume I, or any other minority or woman for that matter, would switch party allegiance or get back on board simply because they put a pretty gal or a model minority on primetime!
I do not dispute the fact that at 37, Governor Jindal has had one hell of a career trajectory. His list of accomplishments are impressive and I can already imagine every Indian auntie and uncle out there rattling them off to their children, in sing-songy desi accents, as examples of what good Indian boys and girls manage to do with their time. But, he is a first term governor of Louisiana for Christ sake. Yes, he has dealt with a lot in LA, post-Katrina and before in his various administrative roles, but you can't tell me that he is the best qualified and most obvious choice to deliver the rebuttal to the national stimulus plan from the entire pantheon of conservative, articulate, true-to-the-real, non-evangelical, aspects-of-Republican-fiscal-and-social-philosophy. I do think his idealogy is in sync with traditional Republican values, but he seems super green and to be frank, he did Republicans no big favor yesterday. I think some people were left wishing for Sarah Palin, and that can never be good.
I do remember that Obama was the junior senator from Illinois not too long ago and had little to no national experience when he spoke at the 2004 DNC and kicked off his meteoric rise in the national political arena. But, I don't think the Democrats put Obama forward because he was black--at least it certainly didn't feel that way. I think they pushed him forward because he was charismatic, energetic and his ideas and beliefs resonated with people. He had to fight many battles to get the party base behind him and I think there are still some moderate Dems who have a hard time with the Obama political juggernaut. Regardless, as a life long member of the Democratic party, I can certainly tell you I didn't feel like I was being pandered to when he got the nomination.
I understand the Republican party is sort of in tatters right now---their situation isn't that different from the way the Dems felt in 2000 and 2004. But, for a country that is still feeling the sting and insult from a first term governor from Alaska with almost zero credetials being nominated to be one heartbeat away from the President of the US simply because she was a woman, the Jindal push is just adding insult to injury. To my Republican friends, Bobby Jindal is not the answer and if you want him to ever have a chance at being your salvations, try leaving him alone in Louisiana for another year or two, get him some speech classes and for the love of GOD, don't make it so obvious that the only reason he is being put out there is because he is Indian, young and has the same generous ears as Pres. Obama!!!
As much as I don't agree with Republicans on most things, having a strong, organized conservative base in this country is necessary and in such trying times, a valid, well though out counterpoint is important in making sure things get done right. That's supposed to be the whole advantage of a two-party system and until the Republicans stop tapping people they think we want to listen to as opposed the people who really know what they are talking about, things are going to be slow-going.
I do not dispute the fact that at 37, Governor Jindal has had one hell of a career trajectory. His list of accomplishments are impressive and I can already imagine every Indian auntie and uncle out there rattling them off to their children, in sing-songy desi accents, as examples of what good Indian boys and girls manage to do with their time. But, he is a first term governor of Louisiana for Christ sake. Yes, he has dealt with a lot in LA, post-Katrina and before in his various administrative roles, but you can't tell me that he is the best qualified and most obvious choice to deliver the rebuttal to the national stimulus plan from the entire pantheon of conservative, articulate, true-to-the-real, non-evangelical, aspects-of-Republican-fiscal-and-social-philosophy. I do think his idealogy is in sync with traditional Republican values, but he seems super green and to be frank, he did Republicans no big favor yesterday. I think some people were left wishing for Sarah Palin, and that can never be good.
I do remember that Obama was the junior senator from Illinois not too long ago and had little to no national experience when he spoke at the 2004 DNC and kicked off his meteoric rise in the national political arena. But, I don't think the Democrats put Obama forward because he was black--at least it certainly didn't feel that way. I think they pushed him forward because he was charismatic, energetic and his ideas and beliefs resonated with people. He had to fight many battles to get the party base behind him and I think there are still some moderate Dems who have a hard time with the Obama political juggernaut. Regardless, as a life long member of the Democratic party, I can certainly tell you I didn't feel like I was being pandered to when he got the nomination.
I understand the Republican party is sort of in tatters right now---their situation isn't that different from the way the Dems felt in 2000 and 2004. But, for a country that is still feeling the sting and insult from a first term governor from Alaska with almost zero credetials being nominated to be one heartbeat away from the President of the US simply because she was a woman, the Jindal push is just adding insult to injury. To my Republican friends, Bobby Jindal is not the answer and if you want him to ever have a chance at being your salvations, try leaving him alone in Louisiana for another year or two, get him some speech classes and for the love of GOD, don't make it so obvious that the only reason he is being put out there is because he is Indian, young and has the same generous ears as Pres. Obama!!!
As much as I don't agree with Republicans on most things, having a strong, organized conservative base in this country is necessary and in such trying times, a valid, well though out counterpoint is important in making sure things get done right. That's supposed to be the whole advantage of a two-party system and until the Republicans stop tapping people they think we want to listen to as opposed the people who really know what they are talking about, things are going to be slow-going.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Ru-mination on turning 29 . . .
I turned 29 on Sunday. In the days preceding what I considered a not-so-major-milestone birthday, I got a lot of questions about how I felt about turning 30 next year. My first response was, " I don't know, I am not turning 30 until NEXT year." My second, less snarky response was,
"I kind of feel relieved because turning 30 marks the end of my tumultuous, transitionary twenties."
To be fair, I am kind of cleaving to my youth. I like that I am still in my twenties and feel that for some reason, all major life accomplishments just SOUND more impressive if you managed to pull them off in your twenties. I also think my generation puts a value on "youth" and "young accomplishments." We have seen many of our contemporaries accomplish amazing things before their 30th birthdays and sort of pressure ourselves into accomplishing similar feats.
But, our generation is also living in a sort of delayed, protracted adolescence and clinging to Ikea furniture, car hand-me-downs, financial assistance from our parents, binge drinking, playing video games and the juvenile sense of entitlement we got from our parents telling us we were special and organizing and planning every free minute of our day as well as everybody being a winner in Little League and the elimination of dodge ball from recess games because its not fair to the kid that gets picked last. And too much adolescence and uncertainty are never a good thing--I feel like I just never grow up or get anywhere because for the past 11 years, all ups and downs in my life have been attributed to the TERRIBLE, NO GOOD VERY BAD T-Word: Transition. And I for one AM SICK AND TIRED OF TRANSITIONING!!!
I want to be THERE already, god dammit!!! Wherever I was supposedly transitioning to for all those years has to be here by now. I mean, four years of college were transition into grad school and/or working life, which were transition into careers and dating and building financial security and independence, which was transition into marriage, cohabitation, home buying and now, I am kind of lost as to what I am supposed to be transitioning into. You know why? BECAUSE TRANSITION WAS AN EXCUSE FOR NOT KNOWING WHAT I WAS DOING OR SUPPOSED TO BE DOING FOR ALL THOSE YEARS! And I am ready to just BE. It seems sort of self-indulgent to attribute all of my not-so-great decisions and lack of prior lack of security and maturity to the fact that I was in transition. I thinks its time to stop deluding myself and grow uo. I don't care if where I am is where I am supposed to be or what I am supposed to be doing, I am here now and I am not budging. I am certainly not changing or moving for the sake of changing or moving anymore. And I am not excusing any parts of my life I don't like simply because I am young and in-between things. I am OUT OF TRANSITION. I am SETTLED.
And settled doesn't mean I have to be sedentary or miserable---I can still quit my job and change cities and try new things. It just means I am not chalking my lack of certainty or discontent up to transition and youth and this dumb idea that as long as I keep moving and am in between things, I won't be held accountable for my actions or be considered a real adult. I want to be considered an adult, I want to be accountable for my actions, I want to feel like my life and hat I do and where I do it matter because they are for real and not part of some short term plan of getting from A to B and then onward to C. And to me, turning 30 marks the end of the transitionary 20s and the start of the truly-there 30s!!!
That's right, I said it. I can't wait to be 30. I think 30 marks the beginning of every person's best phase in life. You are your most attractive, most content and productive and okay where you are without being complacent or still. And most of all, you aren't' just moving to move, changing to change---you are doing things for a reason for once and not because you have to. . . .I am already counting down the days.
"I kind of feel relieved because turning 30 marks the end of my tumultuous, transitionary twenties."
To be fair, I am kind of cleaving to my youth. I like that I am still in my twenties and feel that for some reason, all major life accomplishments just SOUND more impressive if you managed to pull them off in your twenties. I also think my generation puts a value on "youth" and "young accomplishments." We have seen many of our contemporaries accomplish amazing things before their 30th birthdays and sort of pressure ourselves into accomplishing similar feats.
But, our generation is also living in a sort of delayed, protracted adolescence and clinging to Ikea furniture, car hand-me-downs, financial assistance from our parents, binge drinking, playing video games and the juvenile sense of entitlement we got from our parents telling us we were special and organizing and planning every free minute of our day as well as everybody being a winner in Little League and the elimination of dodge ball from recess games because its not fair to the kid that gets picked last. And too much adolescence and uncertainty are never a good thing--I feel like I just never grow up or get anywhere because for the past 11 years, all ups and downs in my life have been attributed to the TERRIBLE, NO GOOD VERY BAD T-Word: Transition. And I for one AM SICK AND TIRED OF TRANSITIONING!!!
I want to be THERE already, god dammit!!! Wherever I was supposedly transitioning to for all those years has to be here by now. I mean, four years of college were transition into grad school and/or working life, which were transition into careers and dating and building financial security and independence, which was transition into marriage, cohabitation, home buying and now, I am kind of lost as to what I am supposed to be transitioning into. You know why? BECAUSE TRANSITION WAS AN EXCUSE FOR NOT KNOWING WHAT I WAS DOING OR SUPPOSED TO BE DOING FOR ALL THOSE YEARS! And I am ready to just BE. It seems sort of self-indulgent to attribute all of my not-so-great decisions and lack of prior lack of security and maturity to the fact that I was in transition. I thinks its time to stop deluding myself and grow uo. I don't care if where I am is where I am supposed to be or what I am supposed to be doing, I am here now and I am not budging. I am certainly not changing or moving for the sake of changing or moving anymore. And I am not excusing any parts of my life I don't like simply because I am young and in-between things. I am OUT OF TRANSITION. I am SETTLED.
And settled doesn't mean I have to be sedentary or miserable---I can still quit my job and change cities and try new things. It just means I am not chalking my lack of certainty or discontent up to transition and youth and this dumb idea that as long as I keep moving and am in between things, I won't be held accountable for my actions or be considered a real adult. I want to be considered an adult, I want to be accountable for my actions, I want to feel like my life and hat I do and where I do it matter because they are for real and not part of some short term plan of getting from A to B and then onward to C. And to me, turning 30 marks the end of the transitionary 20s and the start of the truly-there 30s!!!
That's right, I said it. I can't wait to be 30. I think 30 marks the beginning of every person's best phase in life. You are your most attractive, most content and productive and okay where you are without being complacent or still. And most of all, you aren't' just moving to move, changing to change---you are doing things for a reason for once and not because you have to. . . .I am already counting down the days.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Catch-up: Wedding Etiquette
According to Purva, I have A LOT of blogging to catch up on! Sorry, this past week was sort of crazy with work, etc., but I am back and have a whole new rant for your consideration: appropriate wedding etiquette, for the bride and groom.
As this no-good, very-bad winter finally comes to an end, we have started receiving save-the-dates and invitations for spring and summer weddings. We are smack in the middle of our 5-10 weddings-a-year-phase that many young couples go through. As we are currently in year two of this phase, we have become very good at managing the invites, knowing when to make the travel arrangements, figuring out what to wear and dealing with gifts. And, we both genuinely look forward to attending our friends' weddings and are super excited for the 2009 "wedding season."
But, in the past few weeks, we have been having many conversations with friends and family about the issues that arise when you are invited to numerous weddings in one year and face mounting expenses and fairly outrageous "requests" from the bride and groom. One friend has been invited to a destination wedding, along with two bridal showers and an engagement party, all out of state. The travel expenses alone exceed her 2009 total travel budget and she doesn't feel comfortable not attending all the events because the bride is one of her best friends ad she doesn't think she will understand. I know plenty of people who can relate and I think this begs the question: with all the talk about proper wedding guest behavior, what is the appropriate etiquette for the bride and groom?
I have previously alluded to the changing nature of 20-something and 30-something social life: childhood + high school + college + grad school/military service/numerous post-college positions + multiple moves + family = many possible friends from different backgrounds, in varied places, all in different places in their lives'. With these changes, the wedding guest population is often faced with being invited to a wedding in a location that requires air travel, overnight accommodations and two or three lead-in events that also require travel and gifting. If you are actually in the wedding party, the costs go up exponentially. More and more people find that the honor of being asked to be a part of a loved one's special day is often clouded by the politics and financial stress that go along with being in the wedding party or being invited to a lavish wedding.
It's no secret that we got married last August and had a RIDICULOUS wedding. Our three day, 5 event wedding extravaganza had about 1,000 guests and took place in and around Baltimore over a non-long weekend. Many of our friends flew from various places around the country, rented cars, paid for hotel rooms and attended multiple events---all of which we are EXTREMELY thankful for. Both of us were very concerned about burdening our friends and family with unnecessary expenses and expectations, particularly because we were sensitive to how over-the-top our wedding seemed to non-Indian guests and to older family members.
In planning the wedding and working with our planner, our parents and our bridal party to put it all together, Chet and I learned how to balance being excited about our wedding and making it what we wanted and still be considerate to our guests. I quickly figured out what is acceptable bride-to-be behavior and what pushes you into Bridezilla land. For instance, it is acceptable to limit the guest list only to those people you care about and mean something to you, but it is unacceptable to hold a possible invite over a friend or acquaintance "on the fence" and to discuss your invite list like it is a roster for an exclusive social club. It is acceptable to provide suggestions for accommodations and to secure room blocks at area hotels, it is not acceptable to only suggest $300-night hotel rooms because your venue requires a certain number of hotel room reservations in order for you to secure the banquet hall. It is acceptable to expect your guests to gift you, but it is not acceptable to expect all guests to gift the same as not all guests have the same means. It is also acceptable to want your friends and family to attend the wedding (that is why you are inviting them, after all), but it is not acceptable to invite people you know cannot attend in hopes of "milking a gift," OR to guilt-trip and write-off someone who cannot attend because he or she cannot afford the trip, cannot take time off or has a prior commitment. Last, but most important, though your wedding day is the biggest day of your life and your likely be-all, end-all for the months preceding the big day and though your friends and family are obviously happy for you and excited for the wedding and to be a part of it, IT IS NOT THE ONLY THING THEY HAVE GOING ON IN THEIR LIVES!!!!
So, if you are getting married in the near future, Congrats!!! Savor this time---the engagement is a wonderful time with your significant other, can lead to awesome bonding with friends and family and may be one of the only times in your life when the focus will be entirely on you, your significant other and your love. Make it all about you and don't feel guilty about planning the wedding of your dreams (if any one is looking for a wedding planner, btw, click here)---your friends and family want that for you, too. Just remember that your most special day is one of many other important events your guests have to attend in any given year and that each guest has to work within his or her means and if they can't come to all of the wedding events, or necessarily pay-their-plate, it doesn't mean they don't value your friendship or care about you. If you manage your expectations as a bride, I guarantee you will have a better time during the planning process (I certainly did) and your wedding will be more fun for you AND your guests.
I am going to leave the comments section for advice from the wedding planners in my family to give concrete pointers for brides' to manage their expectations and for your thoughts/ideas, as either a past bride or wedding guest, on how to scale back some of the recent bridezilla madness.
As this no-good, very-bad winter finally comes to an end, we have started receiving save-the-dates and invitations for spring and summer weddings. We are smack in the middle of our 5-10 weddings-a-year-phase that many young couples go through. As we are currently in year two of this phase, we have become very good at managing the invites, knowing when to make the travel arrangements, figuring out what to wear and dealing with gifts. And, we both genuinely look forward to attending our friends' weddings and are super excited for the 2009 "wedding season."
But, in the past few weeks, we have been having many conversations with friends and family about the issues that arise when you are invited to numerous weddings in one year and face mounting expenses and fairly outrageous "requests" from the bride and groom. One friend has been invited to a destination wedding, along with two bridal showers and an engagement party, all out of state. The travel expenses alone exceed her 2009 total travel budget and she doesn't feel comfortable not attending all the events because the bride is one of her best friends ad she doesn't think she will understand. I know plenty of people who can relate and I think this begs the question: with all the talk about proper wedding guest behavior, what is the appropriate etiquette for the bride and groom?
I have previously alluded to the changing nature of 20-something and 30-something social life: childhood + high school + college + grad school/military service/numerous post-college positions + multiple moves + family = many possible friends from different backgrounds, in varied places, all in different places in their lives'. With these changes, the wedding guest population is often faced with being invited to a wedding in a location that requires air travel, overnight accommodations and two or three lead-in events that also require travel and gifting. If you are actually in the wedding party, the costs go up exponentially. More and more people find that the honor of being asked to be a part of a loved one's special day is often clouded by the politics and financial stress that go along with being in the wedding party or being invited to a lavish wedding.
It's no secret that we got married last August and had a RIDICULOUS wedding. Our three day, 5 event wedding extravaganza had about 1,000 guests and took place in and around Baltimore over a non-long weekend. Many of our friends flew from various places around the country, rented cars, paid for hotel rooms and attended multiple events---all of which we are EXTREMELY thankful for. Both of us were very concerned about burdening our friends and family with unnecessary expenses and expectations, particularly because we were sensitive to how over-the-top our wedding seemed to non-Indian guests and to older family members.
In planning the wedding and working with our planner, our parents and our bridal party to put it all together, Chet and I learned how to balance being excited about our wedding and making it what we wanted and still be considerate to our guests. I quickly figured out what is acceptable bride-to-be behavior and what pushes you into Bridezilla land. For instance, it is acceptable to limit the guest list only to those people you care about and mean something to you, but it is unacceptable to hold a possible invite over a friend or acquaintance "on the fence" and to discuss your invite list like it is a roster for an exclusive social club. It is acceptable to provide suggestions for accommodations and to secure room blocks at area hotels, it is not acceptable to only suggest $300-night hotel rooms because your venue requires a certain number of hotel room reservations in order for you to secure the banquet hall. It is acceptable to expect your guests to gift you, but it is not acceptable to expect all guests to gift the same as not all guests have the same means. It is also acceptable to want your friends and family to attend the wedding (that is why you are inviting them, after all), but it is not acceptable to invite people you know cannot attend in hopes of "milking a gift," OR to guilt-trip and write-off someone who cannot attend because he or she cannot afford the trip, cannot take time off or has a prior commitment. Last, but most important, though your wedding day is the biggest day of your life and your likely be-all, end-all for the months preceding the big day and though your friends and family are obviously happy for you and excited for the wedding and to be a part of it, IT IS NOT THE ONLY THING THEY HAVE GOING ON IN THEIR LIVES!!!!
So, if you are getting married in the near future, Congrats!!! Savor this time---the engagement is a wonderful time with your significant other, can lead to awesome bonding with friends and family and may be one of the only times in your life when the focus will be entirely on you, your significant other and your love. Make it all about you and don't feel guilty about planning the wedding of your dreams (if any one is looking for a wedding planner, btw, click here)---your friends and family want that for you, too. Just remember that your most special day is one of many other important events your guests have to attend in any given year and that each guest has to work within his or her means and if they can't come to all of the wedding events, or necessarily pay-their-plate, it doesn't mean they don't value your friendship or care about you. If you manage your expectations as a bride, I guarantee you will have a better time during the planning process (I certainly did) and your wedding will be more fun for you AND your guests.
I am going to leave the comments section for advice from the wedding planners in my family to give concrete pointers for brides' to manage their expectations and for your thoughts/ideas, as either a past bride or wedding guest, on how to scale back some of the recent bridezilla madness.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Recipe Suggestions: Chicken Meatballs
The following is a recipe for chicken meatballs---my husband and I are trying to cook together a few times a week in our continuing effort to turn normal weeknights into "date nights." This has been one of our better we-are-in-a-depression-and-need-to-cut-back-on-spending ideas and we have stumbled across some good ideas!
BTW, if you are cooking more at home and relying on cookbooks, click here for an interesting article about hidden calorie dangers in following recipes at home. Apparently, some cookbooks have amped up portion sizes to compete with restaurants and our waistlines are meant to pay for the difference. I am trying to be wary of this and am considering adding calorie counts to my recipes. Any suggestions on good resources for calorie information are most welcome.
Regardless, here is our recipe for chicken meatballs. You could use turkey, but ground, 98% lean chicken breast is less gamey and lends itself well to this recipe.
Ingredients:
1 lb ground chicken breast
1 egg
1 1/2 cup plain breadcrumbs
3 gloves garlic, minced
1 tsp onion powder
1 tsp black pepper
1 1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp dry rosemary
1 tbsp basil
1 tsp crushed red pepper
1 tsp oregano
Parmesan cheese, for sprinkling before baking
Directions:
Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees. Mix chicken, egg and seasoning completely. Add a pinch of the breadcrumbs to help bind the mixture if necessary. Using a spoon, make 12 even-sized balls (if you like smaller meatballs, make 16 and cut 2-4 minutes from the cooking time) and coat with breadcrumbs. Place meatballs on a baking sheet and cook for about 14 minutes, flipping them halfway through. Baking time may vary depending on your oven, but try to avoid overcooking so as to not dry them out. If in doubt, you can also cook the meatballs in a non-stick skillet, over medium heat, until cooked through the center.
Chet and I had the meatballs with whole wheat angel hair and a simple pomodoro sauce. He made the sauce by simply combining the following and heating all the way through:
14 oz can diced tomatoes
1 cup chopped baby bella mushrooms
Minced garlic to taste
salt
black pepper
basil
We topped off the pasta, meatballs and sauce with a little Parmesan and some black olives (we are admitted olive-philes).
It was a fun meal to make together and even more fun to eat. Your thoughts or suggestions on improvements are welcome in the comments.
I am also looking for a recipe for lamb meatballs, a la Marcie Turney's delicious starter at Bindi. We just ate at this Philly BYO there and I was reminded of why I fell in love with Turney's new twist on Indian food last year when I snaked a bite of my husband's amazing lamb meatballs stuffed with figs in a spicy, yet smooth curry. Congrats to Ms. Turney on her recent James Beard nomination and thanks in advance to anyone who has a good suggestion on how to make a similar dish.
BTW, if you are cooking more at home and relying on cookbooks, click here for an interesting article about hidden calorie dangers in following recipes at home. Apparently, some cookbooks have amped up portion sizes to compete with restaurants and our waistlines are meant to pay for the difference. I am trying to be wary of this and am considering adding calorie counts to my recipes. Any suggestions on good resources for calorie information are most welcome.
Regardless, here is our recipe for chicken meatballs. You could use turkey, but ground, 98% lean chicken breast is less gamey and lends itself well to this recipe.
Ingredients:
1 lb ground chicken breast
1 egg
1 1/2 cup plain breadcrumbs
3 gloves garlic, minced
1 tsp onion powder
1 tsp black pepper
1 1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp dry rosemary
1 tbsp basil
1 tsp crushed red pepper
1 tsp oregano
Parmesan cheese, for sprinkling before baking
Directions:
Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees. Mix chicken, egg and seasoning completely. Add a pinch of the breadcrumbs to help bind the mixture if necessary. Using a spoon, make 12 even-sized balls (if you like smaller meatballs, make 16 and cut 2-4 minutes from the cooking time) and coat with breadcrumbs. Place meatballs on a baking sheet and cook for about 14 minutes, flipping them halfway through. Baking time may vary depending on your oven, but try to avoid overcooking so as to not dry them out. If in doubt, you can also cook the meatballs in a non-stick skillet, over medium heat, until cooked through the center.
Chet and I had the meatballs with whole wheat angel hair and a simple pomodoro sauce. He made the sauce by simply combining the following and heating all the way through:
14 oz can diced tomatoes
1 cup chopped baby bella mushrooms
Minced garlic to taste
salt
black pepper
basil
We topped off the pasta, meatballs and sauce with a little Parmesan and some black olives (we are admitted olive-philes).
It was a fun meal to make together and even more fun to eat. Your thoughts or suggestions on improvements are welcome in the comments.
I am also looking for a recipe for lamb meatballs, a la Marcie Turney's delicious starter at Bindi. We just ate at this Philly BYO there and I was reminded of why I fell in love with Turney's new twist on Indian food last year when I snaked a bite of my husband's amazing lamb meatballs stuffed with figs in a spicy, yet smooth curry. Congrats to Ms. Turney on her recent James Beard nomination and thanks in advance to anyone who has a good suggestion on how to make a similar dish.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Odds and Ends
I am enjoying my impromptu day off (well, its a day NOT in the office, which for me is a day off as of late. . .). This week promises to be pretty brutal on the work front and seeing as how morale is just generally low all around me, I thought a random post about random funny, nice and/or fabulous things was in order.
1. My husband and I have a new dance-party-in-the-living-room song: "That's Not My Name," by The Ting Tings. If you had a bad day, play it super loud and dance around, hipster-style---its as good as Prozac for the soul.
2. Longer days---each day is a minute longer than the last right now and its amazing to slowly see the transformation from grim, ugly winter to bright, beautiful spring.
3. Today, I feel particularly thankful for WaWa coffee, decaf with french vanilla creamer. It was an amazing start to the day and it just smells wonderful.
4. The new Louis Vuitton collection. . .click here if you haven't seen the latest. I know, its a recession, but a girl can dream, can't she?
5. I made the bomb egg salad yesterday (6 eggs, with only three yolks, 2 teaspoons low fat mayo, 1 tbsp dijon mustard, a teaspoon of dill, black pepper, and salt, a little chopped red onion and a pinch of paprika) and there are leftovers for lunch today ;)
6. We officially started packing yesterday and I have actually packed four boxes already!!! Only 100 more to go!!!
7. I have two dozen red roses on the console table in my living room and they are just about perfect.
Okay...enough optimism for the day. The cynical Ru will be back later today with her rant about wedding etiquette for the hosts, a recipe for homemade chicken meatballs and her theory on why Big Love is the best show on television.
While I am at it, anyone have a good recipe for vanilla custard? Or a light, non-chocolate trifle---lots of berries are appreciated.
1. My husband and I have a new dance-party-in-the-living-room song: "That's Not My Name," by The Ting Tings. If you had a bad day, play it super loud and dance around, hipster-style---its as good as Prozac for the soul.
2. Longer days---each day is a minute longer than the last right now and its amazing to slowly see the transformation from grim, ugly winter to bright, beautiful spring.
3. Today, I feel particularly thankful for WaWa coffee, decaf with french vanilla creamer. It was an amazing start to the day and it just smells wonderful.
4. The new Louis Vuitton collection. . .click here if you haven't seen the latest. I know, its a recession, but a girl can dream, can't she?
5. I made the bomb egg salad yesterday (6 eggs, with only three yolks, 2 teaspoons low fat mayo, 1 tbsp dijon mustard, a teaspoon of dill, black pepper, and salt, a little chopped red onion and a pinch of paprika) and there are leftovers for lunch today ;)
6. We officially started packing yesterday and I have actually packed four boxes already!!! Only 100 more to go!!!
7. I have two dozen red roses on the console table in my living room and they are just about perfect.
Okay...enough optimism for the day. The cynical Ru will be back later today with her rant about wedding etiquette for the hosts, a recipe for homemade chicken meatballs and her theory on why Big Love is the best show on television.
While I am at it, anyone have a good recipe for vanilla custard? Or a light, non-chocolate trifle---lots of berries are appreciated.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Breaking up is hard to do...
A good friend is in the midst of a terrible break-up. . . she has been agonizing about this for weeks and doesn't know exactly how to go about pulling the trigger. Every time she has the resolve to just do it, she chickens out and can't go through with it. So now, she is kind of stuck and behaving badly in hopes she will be the dump-ee as opposed to the dump-or.
Sound familiar? Of course it does . . . it's a common problem in the dating world. Except, she isn't trying to break up with a boyfriend, she is trying to break up with a friend.
We all know what she is going through---you have an old friend who has seen you through ups and downs or was once number one on your Thursday emails to make weekend plans. Or, this person made a real effort to befriend you when you were new in town or running low on friends to round out plans and the weekly cell phone rotation. In any event, you used to really like/appreciate/enjoy/need this person, but now. . . not so much.
There are tons of reasons why a friendship can go south and most are pretty similar to why a romantic relationship fizzles out: when it comes down to it, you aren't really this person's biggest fan, he/she has developed a sort of toxic personality and you find yourself fighting with them all the time, this friend is sort of a debbie-downer and is starting to effect the rest of your social life, they keep flaking on you and/or taking advantage of the friendship, etc. But how do you make a clean break? How do you tell a friend you just aren't into her anymore?
I feel like have had this conversation with a lot of people in the past few years. With our generation's mobility and delayed entry into full-blown adulthood, we have more opportunities and outlets for making friends than our parents. And with the increase in selection, the odds of picking duds, for lack of a better word, increases, too. Plus, the fact that we are all kind of transient, at least for the first few years out of school, makes developing friend circles quickly a priority, often at the cost of the quality of the friends and friendships.
To be clear, I think this situation differs from the other, more frequent situation of living in a city for a year or two, making good friends, and then moving and possibly losing touch. In the four years I have lived in Philly, I have made wonderful friends who subsequently left the city and who I still hold in the highest esteem and miss almost daily. Though we try to stay in touch, work/life seem to get in the way, but whenever we do have a chance to see one another, its as if no time has passed.
The I-need-to-break-up-with-her situation usually comes up when you have settled into a place and find the friends you made initially really aren't who you expected them to be OR with old friends from earlier parts of your life that you would really like to leave behind, along with the bad habits and fashions from that time. And the question then becomes, how do you break up with them???
I have known people try (and have personally engaged in) the following: the slow-no-call back, the slow phase out over email, not inviting the friend to a major life event like a wedding or housewarming, not attending a major life event in that person's life, etc. But, all of them seem like passive-aggressive tactics that most dating manuals would tell you are TERRIBLE ways to break up with someone. But, I think its really hard to sit someone down and tell them you are no longer interested in being their friend . . . I mean, how presumptuous is that? It kind of seems like overkill and I would certainly fear coming across like a self-righteous ass. I would certainly break up with a boyfriend with a proper break-up convo (in person boys, an email, text message or phone call do not count), but I am a) not sure what a friend break up is supposed to sound like, and b) don't know what is socially acceptable in this situation as it seems like a relatively new phenomenon.
One thing I do know is that I have personally been unceremoniously dumped before and it took a long time for me to get over it and it hurt for years. It certainly made me question my capacity for friendship and whether I was a good person and sometimes, I just wish I had actually been broken up with instead of just left behind. At least then I would know what caused the break and been able to either learn from it and become a better friend in the future, or seen the other person for who they were and made a conscious decision as to their worth, or lack thereof, as a friend. I feel that not saying anything at all is selfish and cowardly because just like with romantic relationships, the dump-or is usually at fault too and by not saying anything and mentally blaming it all on the dump-ee, you do yourself a disfavor by not having learned anything from the situation.
I am not sure how you really go about breaking up with a friend, but I advised my friend to write out her feelings and why she didn't' want to be friends with this person anymore. I suggested she sleep on it and if the next day, she really didn't think there was any reason to continue in the friendship, she should call her friend and end it. I think being adult about it is better for all involved in the long run and I think she agreed with me. I am not sure there is a right way to break up with a friend, but I do think not doing anything at all is certainly the wrong way to do it and it takes bigger person to actually put it out there, even if there are no real guidelines on how to do it. . . .
Any thoughts on friend break ups or suggestions on how to handle them?
Sound familiar? Of course it does . . . it's a common problem in the dating world. Except, she isn't trying to break up with a boyfriend, she is trying to break up with a friend.
We all know what she is going through---you have an old friend who has seen you through ups and downs or was once number one on your Thursday emails to make weekend plans. Or, this person made a real effort to befriend you when you were new in town or running low on friends to round out plans and the weekly cell phone rotation. In any event, you used to really like/appreciate/enjoy/need this person, but now. . . not so much.
There are tons of reasons why a friendship can go south and most are pretty similar to why a romantic relationship fizzles out: when it comes down to it, you aren't really this person's biggest fan, he/she has developed a sort of toxic personality and you find yourself fighting with them all the time, this friend is sort of a debbie-downer and is starting to effect the rest of your social life, they keep flaking on you and/or taking advantage of the friendship, etc. But how do you make a clean break? How do you tell a friend you just aren't into her anymore?
I feel like have had this conversation with a lot of people in the past few years. With our generation's mobility and delayed entry into full-blown adulthood, we have more opportunities and outlets for making friends than our parents. And with the increase in selection, the odds of picking duds, for lack of a better word, increases, too. Plus, the fact that we are all kind of transient, at least for the first few years out of school, makes developing friend circles quickly a priority, often at the cost of the quality of the friends and friendships.
To be clear, I think this situation differs from the other, more frequent situation of living in a city for a year or two, making good friends, and then moving and possibly losing touch. In the four years I have lived in Philly, I have made wonderful friends who subsequently left the city and who I still hold in the highest esteem and miss almost daily. Though we try to stay in touch, work/life seem to get in the way, but whenever we do have a chance to see one another, its as if no time has passed.
The I-need-to-break-up-with-her situation usually comes up when you have settled into a place and find the friends you made initially really aren't who you expected them to be OR with old friends from earlier parts of your life that you would really like to leave behind, along with the bad habits and fashions from that time. And the question then becomes, how do you break up with them???
I have known people try (and have personally engaged in) the following: the slow-no-call back, the slow phase out over email, not inviting the friend to a major life event like a wedding or housewarming, not attending a major life event in that person's life, etc. But, all of them seem like passive-aggressive tactics that most dating manuals would tell you are TERRIBLE ways to break up with someone. But, I think its really hard to sit someone down and tell them you are no longer interested in being their friend . . . I mean, how presumptuous is that? It kind of seems like overkill and I would certainly fear coming across like a self-righteous ass. I would certainly break up with a boyfriend with a proper break-up convo (in person boys, an email, text message or phone call do not count), but I am a) not sure what a friend break up is supposed to sound like, and b) don't know what is socially acceptable in this situation as it seems like a relatively new phenomenon.
One thing I do know is that I have personally been unceremoniously dumped before and it took a long time for me to get over it and it hurt for years. It certainly made me question my capacity for friendship and whether I was a good person and sometimes, I just wish I had actually been broken up with instead of just left behind. At least then I would know what caused the break and been able to either learn from it and become a better friend in the future, or seen the other person for who they were and made a conscious decision as to their worth, or lack thereof, as a friend. I feel that not saying anything at all is selfish and cowardly because just like with romantic relationships, the dump-or is usually at fault too and by not saying anything and mentally blaming it all on the dump-ee, you do yourself a disfavor by not having learned anything from the situation.
I am not sure how you really go about breaking up with a friend, but I advised my friend to write out her feelings and why she didn't' want to be friends with this person anymore. I suggested she sleep on it and if the next day, she really didn't think there was any reason to continue in the friendship, she should call her friend and end it. I think being adult about it is better for all involved in the long run and I think she agreed with me. I am not sure there is a right way to break up with a friend, but I do think not doing anything at all is certainly the wrong way to do it and it takes bigger person to actually put it out there, even if there are no real guidelines on how to do it. . . .
Any thoughts on friend break ups or suggestions on how to handle them?
Alexander McQueen for Target
So two of my favorite things are about to collide March 1st: Target and Alexander McQueen. The collection is awesome and I can think of at least three things I MUST have. For a preview of the the entire line, click here. Not sure of the shoes are included, but I totally want the electric blue mini dress, the black shirtdress and the black slip dress with the silver accent at the sleeve holes...
Sick days
I was out sick yesterday, hence no posts. I have plenty to catch up on, so I will post more later, but I am putting out a request for thoughts on the new Lily Allen CD. If you have previewed it and like, love it or hate it, let me know...
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Query: Wide, flat rice noodles for drunken noodles
Anyone know where I can find these in Philly? I have tried some Asian food stores, but to no avail. While we are on the subject, any suggestions as to the best Asian food stores along Washington? I just picked up a Southeast Asian cookbook and have several recipes I want to try, but need all the right ingredients.
The Big Apple...more and more a pipe dream?
Don't know how many of you saw this article, but it sure made me think:
According to a recent study, New Yorkers making $123K have the same standard of living as someone making $50K in Houston and those making $60K have the same standard of living as people in Atlanta making about $23K. I mean, we all know NYC is expensive, but isn't the disparity just ridiculous?
With all the talk in recent weeks about ridiculous bonuses for the financial industry and Mayor Bloomberg's defense of the practice as a necessity to keep NYC's economy afloat, these numbers are eye-opening. For years, I have seen former college and grad school classmates struggle to pay rent and student loans and make ends meet and still trying to put a little towards enjoying the city they pay such a steep premium to live in. The argument for such a struggle was always the same: there are career opportunities available in NYC that you can't find anywhere else, this is NEW YORK, its just the way things are done here, if I pay my dues now, I am guaranteed to make enough in the future that it will all be worth it . . . . I, too, was always drawn to the allure of the city and all that it seemingly had to offer. But, the harsh reality of what it takes to "just get by" in New York, plus the tremendous slow down of the city's economy caused by the near collapse of the financial industry has to make people re-consider living in New York.
I am not sure what to make of it all, but I do wonder what people will do in the months to come---will they stay and wait out the downturn? Will this current depression change the long term demand for NYC living and help deflate the cost of living? One thing is certain, the dream of making it in the big city seem all the more elusive these days. . . .
According to a recent study, New Yorkers making $123K have the same standard of living as someone making $50K in Houston and those making $60K have the same standard of living as people in Atlanta making about $23K. I mean, we all know NYC is expensive, but isn't the disparity just ridiculous?
With all the talk in recent weeks about ridiculous bonuses for the financial industry and Mayor Bloomberg's defense of the practice as a necessity to keep NYC's economy afloat, these numbers are eye-opening. For years, I have seen former college and grad school classmates struggle to pay rent and student loans and make ends meet and still trying to put a little towards enjoying the city they pay such a steep premium to live in. The argument for such a struggle was always the same: there are career opportunities available in NYC that you can't find anywhere else, this is NEW YORK, its just the way things are done here, if I pay my dues now, I am guaranteed to make enough in the future that it will all be worth it . . . . I, too, was always drawn to the allure of the city and all that it seemingly had to offer. But, the harsh reality of what it takes to "just get by" in New York, plus the tremendous slow down of the city's economy caused by the near collapse of the financial industry has to make people re-consider living in New York.
I am not sure what to make of it all, but I do wonder what people will do in the months to come---will they stay and wait out the downturn? Will this current depression change the long term demand for NYC living and help deflate the cost of living? One thing is certain, the dream of making it in the big city seem all the more elusive these days. . . .
Monday, February 9, 2009
Additional Random thoughts on this No Good, Very Bad Monday
My Monday has been kinda stinky so far. . .more so than the normal Monday. As I finally have some free time, I felt the uncontrollable need to share the following thoughts:
1. Why did Tameka Raymond have to have "routine surgery," i.e. plastic surgery, in Brazil? What was girlfriend getting done that was so bad she couldn't get Dr. Raj to do it here?? And why did she need to get it done during Grammy weekend??
2. Um, why do celebrities continue to get matching tatoos and/or each other's names on their bodies. In light of the potential woes facing Rihanna and Chris Brown, who have matching tats, i wonder if the ink is factoring into their convos about staying together. Does no one remember Wynona to Wino??? Hello!
3. Why are there so many sales out there, but not a single thing worth buying? And where will all the terrible, shapeless clothes from this past winter season go now? They obviously cant' send them to India or Africa like they can "Arizona Cardinals, Super Bowl Champs" t-shirts. Its too hot in those places for ill-fitting, drab colored cardigans.
4. Can somebody please tell President Obama the election is over and that he can stop lobbying the American people for "votes?" I could have told him the Republicans in Congress weren't going to play nice. . .he should just go back to DC and do what we voted him in to do, he has a CLEAR mandate from us that we are on board...
5. Does anyone know where I can find a nice and fairly inexpensive charcoal gray skirt? I prefer A-line or full and it should hit right below the knee. A shimmery/metallic look is much appreciated---I have the perfect coral sweater I want to pair with a pretty gray skirt of the first day of spring...
1. Why did Tameka Raymond have to have "routine surgery," i.e. plastic surgery, in Brazil? What was girlfriend getting done that was so bad she couldn't get Dr. Raj to do it here?? And why did she need to get it done during Grammy weekend??
2. Um, why do celebrities continue to get matching tatoos and/or each other's names on their bodies. In light of the potential woes facing Rihanna and Chris Brown, who have matching tats, i wonder if the ink is factoring into their convos about staying together. Does no one remember Wynona to Wino??? Hello!
3. Why are there so many sales out there, but not a single thing worth buying? And where will all the terrible, shapeless clothes from this past winter season go now? They obviously cant' send them to India or Africa like they can "Arizona Cardinals, Super Bowl Champs" t-shirts. Its too hot in those places for ill-fitting, drab colored cardigans.
4. Can somebody please tell President Obama the election is over and that he can stop lobbying the American people for "votes?" I could have told him the Republicans in Congress weren't going to play nice. . .he should just go back to DC and do what we voted him in to do, he has a CLEAR mandate from us that we are on board...
5. Does anyone know where I can find a nice and fairly inexpensive charcoal gray skirt? I prefer A-line or full and it should hit right below the knee. A shimmery/metallic look is much appreciated---I have the perfect coral sweater I want to pair with a pretty gray skirt of the first day of spring...
The Grammys
I am not sure I liked the Grammys' broadcast last night. Though I appreciate the effort to make the awards' show more about music as opposed to irrelevant pats on the back intended to boost the egos of pop performers, I am not so sure the performances were particularly inspired last night. There were a few exceptions (see below), but by and large, I was very underwhelmed.
First of all, WHAT was Katy Perry doing? She can't dance, her vocals were eh and her costume was way over the top (and not in a fabulous, Cher-wearing-Bob-Mackey kind of way, more like a make-Carmen-Miranda-roll-over-in-her-grave kind of way). My husband actually said that watching Katy dance was more cringe-worthy than watching Brittney at the VMAs---that's saying A Lot.
And what was with the awful presenters? The Rock, seriously people? His joke about loving the Grammys and kissing a girl were TERRIBLE. Even J-T's attempts at humor about running into Al Green at the General Store in Memphis fell flat. Why was Kate Beckinsale chosen to introduce Sir Paul McCartney---couldn't they find a more relevant British actress (like, I don't know, Kate Winslet??). And why does Gwyneth Paltrow get to introduce Radiohead? Just 'cause she is Mrs. Chris Martin? At least she didn't make an affected-accent gaffe like she did with Anthony Hopkins when he won an award last year.
I did, however, enjoy Radiohead's performance--Thom Yorke's jerky movements and all. Not sure I loved Chris Martin's hoarse, scratchy vocals on Viva la Vida, but their acceptance speeches were first-rate and I just loved them in their knock-off Sgt. Pepper costumes. I do wonder if anyone told Stevie Wonder who the Jonas Brothers were before he agreed to perform with them, but the littlest heart-throb of them all, Nick, did a pretty decent job singing along with Mr. Wonder. I definitely could have done without watching MIA jumping around on stage, in a sheer unitard with polka dot patches over her nether-regions and baby bump no less, all the while fearing that she would give birth ON THE GRAMMY stage. It was kind of cute, but more creepy, to see TI rap to her belly and I could kind of see a sigh of relief on all four rappers' faces when the set was over.
There are so many more performances and no-no's to discuss (for instance, what is Kanye thinking with his hair right now? Is Taylor Hicks really Miley's new bff? Why is Keith Urban just so so adorable? Has John Mayer always been so goofy looking? Smokey Robinson sure does look good for his age. Did Chris Brown really rough up Ri-Ri? When is TI going to jail, exactly? Why is Dave Grohl so awesome? Does anyone care that Blink 182 is back together? etc. etc.), but the biggest highlight for me, all night, was seeing Jennifer Hudson. There has been so much talk of her heartache and struggles and how this weekend was her official re-entry into the spotlight and I have to say, she gave me goosebumps. Of course Jennifer Hudson could always sing---but last night, she made magic. And her grace, faith, poise and strength made her absolutely radiant. I could have done without the camera pans to her fiancee (and former I Love New York contestant) David Otunga, but it seems as though he loves her and she loves him and of all the people in the world who could use a little love right now, Jennifer Hudson is certainly one of them.
I do enjoy awards season though and am getting pretty stoked for the main event on February 22d, which also happens to be my birthday. And, I hope, that as a b-day gift to me, MIA will have delivered and will not be appearing/performing with AR Rahman. I also hope the Rock will not be presenting and that Miley Cyrus's invitation was conveniently lost in the mail.
First of all, WHAT was Katy Perry doing? She can't dance, her vocals were eh and her costume was way over the top (and not in a fabulous, Cher-wearing-Bob-Mackey kind of way, more like a make-Carmen-Miranda-roll-over-in-her-grave kind of way). My husband actually said that watching Katy dance was more cringe-worthy than watching Brittney at the VMAs---that's saying A Lot.
And what was with the awful presenters? The Rock, seriously people? His joke about loving the Grammys and kissing a girl were TERRIBLE. Even J-T's attempts at humor about running into Al Green at the General Store in Memphis fell flat. Why was Kate Beckinsale chosen to introduce Sir Paul McCartney---couldn't they find a more relevant British actress (like, I don't know, Kate Winslet??). And why does Gwyneth Paltrow get to introduce Radiohead? Just 'cause she is Mrs. Chris Martin? At least she didn't make an affected-accent gaffe like she did with Anthony Hopkins when he won an award last year.
I did, however, enjoy Radiohead's performance--Thom Yorke's jerky movements and all. Not sure I loved Chris Martin's hoarse, scratchy vocals on Viva la Vida, but their acceptance speeches were first-rate and I just loved them in their knock-off Sgt. Pepper costumes. I do wonder if anyone told Stevie Wonder who the Jonas Brothers were before he agreed to perform with them, but the littlest heart-throb of them all, Nick, did a pretty decent job singing along with Mr. Wonder. I definitely could have done without watching MIA jumping around on stage, in a sheer unitard with polka dot patches over her nether-regions and baby bump no less, all the while fearing that she would give birth ON THE GRAMMY stage. It was kind of cute, but more creepy, to see TI rap to her belly and I could kind of see a sigh of relief on all four rappers' faces when the set was over.
There are so many more performances and no-no's to discuss (for instance, what is Kanye thinking with his hair right now? Is Taylor Hicks really Miley's new bff? Why is Keith Urban just so so adorable? Has John Mayer always been so goofy looking? Smokey Robinson sure does look good for his age. Did Chris Brown really rough up Ri-Ri? When is TI going to jail, exactly? Why is Dave Grohl so awesome? Does anyone care that Blink 182 is back together? etc. etc.), but the biggest highlight for me, all night, was seeing Jennifer Hudson. There has been so much talk of her heartache and struggles and how this weekend was her official re-entry into the spotlight and I have to say, she gave me goosebumps. Of course Jennifer Hudson could always sing---but last night, she made magic. And her grace, faith, poise and strength made her absolutely radiant. I could have done without the camera pans to her fiancee (and former I Love New York contestant) David Otunga, but it seems as though he loves her and she loves him and of all the people in the world who could use a little love right now, Jennifer Hudson is certainly one of them.
I do enjoy awards season though and am getting pretty stoked for the main event on February 22d, which also happens to be my birthday. And, I hope, that as a b-day gift to me, MIA will have delivered and will not be appearing/performing with AR Rahman. I also hope the Rock will not be presenting and that Miley Cyrus's invitation was conveniently lost in the mail.
Friday, February 6, 2009
Valentine's Day for the Romantically-Challenged
Its a slow work day, therefore a productive blogging day. I am currently waiting for some dictation to be returned to me for revision (I love being able to dictate, by the way. I only wish I had a secretary during college and grad school, I would have dictated away!!! And yes, the pun is intended).
Anyway, as I was waiting and finishing up my lunch, a co-worker dropped by in need of some advice for Valentine's Day. He has only been dating this girl for three months, but he really likes her and it's clear that they are something more than dating, but less than boyfriend-girlfriend. ( I leave you, the reader, to ponder as to how unclear their status actually is and specifically ask non-married readers to clarify the current lexicon for the various states of dating and what they signify. Though I haven't been married long and remember my own dating woes quite vividly, I would like a fresh perspective on this topic to see if things are still as I remember. Last digression, I promise). He wants to do something, but not quite sure what and claims to be romantically-challenged.
So, I suggested that he take her on a good, old-fashioned, proper date. You know, the kind you see in the movie where the guy comes to pick the girl up at her apartment and brings her flowers. They then make small talk and head out for a nice dinner, followed by a nightcap and he drops her off at home. I personally have never been on such a date, but I remember really wanting to go on one when I was single. And no, that is not an indirect jab at my husband---he does just fine in the dating department.
My suggestion lead to additional questions as to how fancy the place should be, what makes a place romantic, does he still need to get her a gift, etc. So then, I suggested he make dinner for both of them, get a bottle of wine, and go over to her house for a picnic. An indoor one, of course. But, he cant' cook, so that's a problem. And this solution doesnt' necessarily solve the other issues about gifts and costs.
So then I decided I didnt' have anymore ideas for him and dropped the bomb on him: I actually don't really like Valentine's Day and think it's an unnecessarily cruel way to make people feel bad about being single AND to force those of us who aren't single into spending money on rather impersonal sentiment. He looked at me like I had three heads.
"Isn't your husband taking you out?" he asked. "Yes, he is." "And wouldn't you be upset if he didn't?" "Yes, I would. In fact, I specifically asked him to do something special this year." "Then how can you say you dislike Valentine's Day? Doesn't that make you a hypocrite?" "No, I do not feel like a hypocrite, I feel like a slave to convention and am weak for not sticking to my guns and insisting on taking part in the farce because last year we didn't and I felt very sad and left out!" "Wow, that is deep and it sounds like you have issues." And then, he promptly left my office to search for another, less crazy woman to give him advice.
The thing is, I don't think I am alone in this feeling. I don't know many people who look forward to Valentine's Day. None of my single friends are counting down the days until someone rubs their singledom (which, for most of them, is fairly rewarding and often far more exciting than being taken) in their face. My male friends in relationships definitely do not look forward to the stress associated with planning the perfect date for a particular night just because Hallmark says so. And, though the women I know in relationships appreciate a nice night out, I sincerely doubt they would mind not doing something on Valentine's Day if other people didn't make such a big deal about it or if they felt that they could get their significant others to do something romantic on a random night.
Maybe we should all boycott Valentine's Day? Maybe Valentine's Day is amateur night for romantics? Like New Year's Eve is for partiers---one night of the year, people who are otherwise not big partiers feel the need to have CRAZY plans just so they aren't left out when everyone else discusses their CRAZY plans all through December. The non-partiers, or amateurs, then come out in droves and ruin it for the rest of us who party all the time and New Year's always ends up being a big let down for everyone. For those of you who enjoy Valentine's Day and love doing something cute and romantic, goodonya. But for those of us who are romantically-challenged 364 days of the year and think, Valentine's Day is overrated, let's not jump on the bandwagon!!! Let's not buy the hype and instead, think for ourselves and do what we want on February 14th!!! Let's go to a movie, or stay in, or do whatever we feel like, instead of going through the motions or feeling bad because we don't have anyone to go through the motions with!!! The truly romantic ones of the lot will appreciate us not cluttering the reservation books and snapping up all the red roses. . .
The only thing is . . . let's just all agree, though, to not start boycotting Valentine's Day until next year because Mister is taking me to a really nice restaurant next weekend and I don't want to risk staying in on the off-chance that enough of you don't come around by then. . . .
Anyway, as I was waiting and finishing up my lunch, a co-worker dropped by in need of some advice for Valentine's Day. He has only been dating this girl for three months, but he really likes her and it's clear that they are something more than dating, but less than boyfriend-girlfriend. ( I leave you, the reader, to ponder as to how unclear their status actually is and specifically ask non-married readers to clarify the current lexicon for the various states of dating and what they signify. Though I haven't been married long and remember my own dating woes quite vividly, I would like a fresh perspective on this topic to see if things are still as I remember. Last digression, I promise). He wants to do something, but not quite sure what and claims to be romantically-challenged.
So, I suggested that he take her on a good, old-fashioned, proper date. You know, the kind you see in the movie where the guy comes to pick the girl up at her apartment and brings her flowers. They then make small talk and head out for a nice dinner, followed by a nightcap and he drops her off at home. I personally have never been on such a date, but I remember really wanting to go on one when I was single. And no, that is not an indirect jab at my husband---he does just fine in the dating department.
My suggestion lead to additional questions as to how fancy the place should be, what makes a place romantic, does he still need to get her a gift, etc. So then, I suggested he make dinner for both of them, get a bottle of wine, and go over to her house for a picnic. An indoor one, of course. But, he cant' cook, so that's a problem. And this solution doesnt' necessarily solve the other issues about gifts and costs.
So then I decided I didnt' have anymore ideas for him and dropped the bomb on him: I actually don't really like Valentine's Day and think it's an unnecessarily cruel way to make people feel bad about being single AND to force those of us who aren't single into spending money on rather impersonal sentiment. He looked at me like I had three heads.
"Isn't your husband taking you out?" he asked. "Yes, he is." "And wouldn't you be upset if he didn't?" "Yes, I would. In fact, I specifically asked him to do something special this year." "Then how can you say you dislike Valentine's Day? Doesn't that make you a hypocrite?" "No, I do not feel like a hypocrite, I feel like a slave to convention and am weak for not sticking to my guns and insisting on taking part in the farce because last year we didn't and I felt very sad and left out!" "Wow, that is deep and it sounds like you have issues." And then, he promptly left my office to search for another, less crazy woman to give him advice.
The thing is, I don't think I am alone in this feeling. I don't know many people who look forward to Valentine's Day. None of my single friends are counting down the days until someone rubs their singledom (which, for most of them, is fairly rewarding and often far more exciting than being taken) in their face. My male friends in relationships definitely do not look forward to the stress associated with planning the perfect date for a particular night just because Hallmark says so. And, though the women I know in relationships appreciate a nice night out, I sincerely doubt they would mind not doing something on Valentine's Day if other people didn't make such a big deal about it or if they felt that they could get their significant others to do something romantic on a random night.
Maybe we should all boycott Valentine's Day? Maybe Valentine's Day is amateur night for romantics? Like New Year's Eve is for partiers---one night of the year, people who are otherwise not big partiers feel the need to have CRAZY plans just so they aren't left out when everyone else discusses their CRAZY plans all through December. The non-partiers, or amateurs, then come out in droves and ruin it for the rest of us who party all the time and New Year's always ends up being a big let down for everyone. For those of you who enjoy Valentine's Day and love doing something cute and romantic, goodonya. But for those of us who are romantically-challenged 364 days of the year and think, Valentine's Day is overrated, let's not jump on the bandwagon!!! Let's not buy the hype and instead, think for ourselves and do what we want on February 14th!!! Let's go to a movie, or stay in, or do whatever we feel like, instead of going through the motions or feeling bad because we don't have anyone to go through the motions with!!! The truly romantic ones of the lot will appreciate us not cluttering the reservation books and snapping up all the red roses. . .
The only thing is . . . let's just all agree, though, to not start boycotting Valentine's Day until next year because Mister is taking me to a really nice restaurant next weekend and I don't want to risk staying in on the off-chance that enough of you don't come around by then. . . .
The Container Store, re-visited
Apartment Therapy, a site I frequent a great deal, just had a post on the Container Store and their Elfa Sale going on right now:
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/dc/painting-fixing-repair/closet-and-other-renovations-made-easier-elfa-sale-at-the-container-store-075939
Check it out and see what the buzz is all about.
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/dc/painting-fixing-repair/closet-and-other-renovations-made-easier-elfa-sale-at-the-container-store-075939
Check it out and see what the buzz is all about.
Friday Comfort Foods: Mom's Chicken Curry
The Northeast is in the middle of a big freeze---it hasn't snowed much in Philly this winter, but man has it been cold. What's even worse is just how gray and damp this whole winter has been, spring just seems so so far away.
My friend Rachel has one positive spin on winter--it's the time of year for comfort foods. The dreary days between the holiday season and the first signs of spring are the best times to enjoy simple, hearty foods that fill you up and take the chill out of your bones.
In our house, the best meals are made on the weekends---primarily because like most working women, I simply cannot be bothered to make big meals during the week. I am sure most at-home moms find it equally as difficult---there is just too much to do monday through thursday to make elaborate meals. Most comfort foods, to be made right, take a little time and some extra TLC and in my mother's house, Friday was always comfort food night.
My mother's brand of comfort food was always the same thing: chicken curry. She uses skinless legs and thighs, bone-in, with a homemade paste and cooks it for 2 hours. It's delicious and the meat just falls off the bones. Below is her recipe for the paste, which I make in advance and freeze and use for all sorts of things. This recipe may take some time to master and require a few trips to the spice market, but trust me, it is so so worth it.
Yasmin's recipe for homemade curry paste:
Ingredients:
1 large sweet onion, diced
1 can diced tomatoes or 4-5 fresh Romas
4-5 cloves garlic, minced
1-2 jalapenos, diced (remove seeds if you desire less heat)
1 tbsp grated ginger
For the "vaghar" or prepping the oil:
1 tbsp whole peppercorns
1 tbssp whole cloves
1 tbsp whole cumin
1 bay leaf
1 dried chili (the red kind you get at any Asian store is fine)
1 stick cinnamon
Dry spices:
2 tbsp garam masala
1 tbsp coriander powder
1 tbsp cumin powder
1 tsp lal mirch (this is red chili powder, not to be confused with chili powder used in Mexican cooking, you can find it in most spice stores)
1 tbsp turmeric
1/2 tsp clove powder (you can use even less, this just adds aroma and color)
1/2 tsp cinnamon powder (again, just a pinch is fine really)
salt to taste
Vegetable oil
Instructions:
Coat the bottom of a large pot with vegetable oil and heat oil. Make sure you dont' heat the oil so much that you smell it (that means it is too hot and possibley burning)--I suggest keeping the range at a med setting while making this entire dish.
Once the oil is hot, you do the vaghar, which is a Gujrathi word for seasoning the cooking oil with dry, whole seeds. Most Indian cooking starts this way, and a lengthier post on the art of vaghar will follow later. First, add the cumin and peppercorns. Once they start to "sizzle", add the dry chili, the cloves, bay leaf, cinnamon stick and stir to make sure they don't burn. After you begin to smell the cumin and cinnamon release, add the chopped onion and mix thoroughly. If the pot is too hot, the onion will start to burn and wilt too quickly, so be sure to monitor the heat.
Add a pinch of salt to help the reduction process and also add the ginger, jalapenos and garlic. Allow the onions to cook down for about 10-15 minutes, at a med low heat, until they are all browned and have reduced to about 2/3 their original quantity.
Then add the tomatoes and allow for the whole mixture to cook for another 5-7 minutes or until the tomatoes are soft. Add all dry spices, salt to taste and stir and allow mixture to cook for another 3-4 minutes. At this point, my mom usually lets the mixture reduce even further, but I prefer to remove from heat and once it is sufficiently cooled, I puree the mix in a food processor.
You should get about a cup and a half to two cups of the paste. This is enough to make two batches of curry, each with about 12 pieces of chicken. If you think you need more as you being to cook the chicken, you can always add more. The trick is knowing that the marrow of the chicken and the fat will render and with the paste, make the curry.
Making the Curry (feeds 4-6):
Bring approx one cup of the paste back to medium heat. Add 12 pieces of chicken, legs and thighs mixed (my mom prefers all thighs from a halal market nearby and makes my cousin Jay pick it up every week, I prefer a mix of white and dark meat), 1 1/2 cups water and bring the whole thing to a boil. You can add more water if a thinner curry is desired.
Then reduce heat and allow the chicken to simmer, partially covered, for about an hour. You can then add frozen fenugreek greens or methi (available at most indian stores) or spinach for some green and flavor and hard boiled eggs as well. (A good rule for eggs is to do half of the number of chicken pieces and to remove the yolks.) Continue to cook the chicken until the oil is released and rises to the top. I usually skim the oil and then allow the chicken to sit for 10-15 minutes b/f serving it. My mom will tell you to keep the chicken on low for as long as you can, but Chet and I are too impatient for that.
Serve with rice or store-bought nan. We also do an onion garnish and serve with yogurt. If you want suggestions on how to serve or what to pair the meal with, ask in the comments section and I am happy to help.
The remaining paste can be frozen and stays good for up to 3 months. More recipe ideas for the paste to come.
My friend Rachel has one positive spin on winter--it's the time of year for comfort foods. The dreary days between the holiday season and the first signs of spring are the best times to enjoy simple, hearty foods that fill you up and take the chill out of your bones.
In our house, the best meals are made on the weekends---primarily because like most working women, I simply cannot be bothered to make big meals during the week. I am sure most at-home moms find it equally as difficult---there is just too much to do monday through thursday to make elaborate meals. Most comfort foods, to be made right, take a little time and some extra TLC and in my mother's house, Friday was always comfort food night.
My mother's brand of comfort food was always the same thing: chicken curry. She uses skinless legs and thighs, bone-in, with a homemade paste and cooks it for 2 hours. It's delicious and the meat just falls off the bones. Below is her recipe for the paste, which I make in advance and freeze and use for all sorts of things. This recipe may take some time to master and require a few trips to the spice market, but trust me, it is so so worth it.
Yasmin's recipe for homemade curry paste:
Ingredients:
1 large sweet onion, diced
1 can diced tomatoes or 4-5 fresh Romas
4-5 cloves garlic, minced
1-2 jalapenos, diced (remove seeds if you desire less heat)
1 tbsp grated ginger
For the "vaghar" or prepping the oil:
1 tbsp whole peppercorns
1 tbssp whole cloves
1 tbsp whole cumin
1 bay leaf
1 dried chili (the red kind you get at any Asian store is fine)
1 stick cinnamon
Dry spices:
2 tbsp garam masala
1 tbsp coriander powder
1 tbsp cumin powder
1 tsp lal mirch (this is red chili powder, not to be confused with chili powder used in Mexican cooking, you can find it in most spice stores)
1 tbsp turmeric
1/2 tsp clove powder (you can use even less, this just adds aroma and color)
1/2 tsp cinnamon powder (again, just a pinch is fine really)
salt to taste
Vegetable oil
Instructions:
Coat the bottom of a large pot with vegetable oil and heat oil. Make sure you dont' heat the oil so much that you smell it (that means it is too hot and possibley burning)--I suggest keeping the range at a med setting while making this entire dish.
Once the oil is hot, you do the vaghar, which is a Gujrathi word for seasoning the cooking oil with dry, whole seeds. Most Indian cooking starts this way, and a lengthier post on the art of vaghar will follow later. First, add the cumin and peppercorns. Once they start to "sizzle", add the dry chili, the cloves, bay leaf, cinnamon stick and stir to make sure they don't burn. After you begin to smell the cumin and cinnamon release, add the chopped onion and mix thoroughly. If the pot is too hot, the onion will start to burn and wilt too quickly, so be sure to monitor the heat.
Add a pinch of salt to help the reduction process and also add the ginger, jalapenos and garlic. Allow the onions to cook down for about 10-15 minutes, at a med low heat, until they are all browned and have reduced to about 2/3 their original quantity.
Then add the tomatoes and allow for the whole mixture to cook for another 5-7 minutes or until the tomatoes are soft. Add all dry spices, salt to taste and stir and allow mixture to cook for another 3-4 minutes. At this point, my mom usually lets the mixture reduce even further, but I prefer to remove from heat and once it is sufficiently cooled, I puree the mix in a food processor.
You should get about a cup and a half to two cups of the paste. This is enough to make two batches of curry, each with about 12 pieces of chicken. If you think you need more as you being to cook the chicken, you can always add more. The trick is knowing that the marrow of the chicken and the fat will render and with the paste, make the curry.
Making the Curry (feeds 4-6):
Bring approx one cup of the paste back to medium heat. Add 12 pieces of chicken, legs and thighs mixed (my mom prefers all thighs from a halal market nearby and makes my cousin Jay pick it up every week, I prefer a mix of white and dark meat), 1 1/2 cups water and bring the whole thing to a boil. You can add more water if a thinner curry is desired.
Then reduce heat and allow the chicken to simmer, partially covered, for about an hour. You can then add frozen fenugreek greens or methi (available at most indian stores) or spinach for some green and flavor and hard boiled eggs as well. (A good rule for eggs is to do half of the number of chicken pieces and to remove the yolks.) Continue to cook the chicken until the oil is released and rises to the top. I usually skim the oil and then allow the chicken to sit for 10-15 minutes b/f serving it. My mom will tell you to keep the chicken on low for as long as you can, but Chet and I are too impatient for that.
Serve with rice or store-bought nan. We also do an onion garnish and serve with yogurt. If you want suggestions on how to serve or what to pair the meal with, ask in the comments section and I am happy to help.
The remaining paste can be frozen and stays good for up to 3 months. More recipe ideas for the paste to come.
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Stephen King On Stephanie Meyer: Is there such a thing as a "good" writer?
Stephen King recently gave an interview in which he noted that both J.K.Rowling and Stephanie Meyer target young adult readers, but whereas J.K. Rowling can write, Meyer "isn't very good."
Now, I am not exactly sure what he meant by that comment or if Stephanie Meyer even cares. I know about a million women of all ages who SWEAR by the love story between Edward and Bella and devour Ms. Meyer's every word. For the record, I have never read the Twilight series, but my 12 year old sister adores it. My 15 year old sister couldn't initially get through the first book because of Meyer's "terrible writing,"but overcame that problem once she got sucked into the story. I have heard others complain about the quality of the writing, but almost all of them have still read and re-read the books.
What I really wonder is what King means by "good," and if he, of all people, is qualified to make such a statement. Obviously, King is a prolific writer who has seen much success in his career (on a side note, if there are any struggling writers out there, you should really read King's own account of his days as an almost-starving teacher with a family who never gave up hope...it's really inspiring.) But a critics' darling, Mr. King is certainly not. He is clearly an imaginative storyteller, capable of creating characters and plots which resonate with his readers, but I am not sure if the literary intelligentsia considers his work seminal. I know that I like his novels and will always read them. This is because even if I don't like his writing per se, I almost always like his stories.
To be honest, I am not sure there is such a thing as a "good" writer. There are certainly successful writers and not--so-successful writers and writers of great acclaim and those who garner little regard. But, there hasn't always been a direct correlation between those who are the best with those who are the most successful. I assume the millions of people around the world who have read the Twilight series think Ms. Meyer's writing is a-ok, otherwise they wouldn't be spending mad money on her books. If you ask them, they think her stories are amazing and they feel as though they have entered in this amazing place she has created just for them. That is probably why she is earning gajillions of dollars right now. That's also probably why Mr. King does so well, despite past criticism over the quality if his writing.
As a young adult, I came across several books which resonated with me and that I was oh-so-crazy about--some were by noted writers (Austen, Steinbeck, the Bronte sisters), some, not so much (the Nancy Drew books, even Ayn Rand, who was never considered a great writer in her time). Even now, after years of being provided examples of "good" writing, I still find their stories compelling. Does it matter if Stephanie Meyer is a "good" writer if people read her books, anyway? Or, does the fact that she writes for young adults place a greater responsibility on her to write better?
What are your thoughts?
Now, I am not exactly sure what he meant by that comment or if Stephanie Meyer even cares. I know about a million women of all ages who SWEAR by the love story between Edward and Bella and devour Ms. Meyer's every word. For the record, I have never read the Twilight series, but my 12 year old sister adores it. My 15 year old sister couldn't initially get through the first book because of Meyer's "terrible writing,"but overcame that problem once she got sucked into the story. I have heard others complain about the quality of the writing, but almost all of them have still read and re-read the books.
What I really wonder is what King means by "good," and if he, of all people, is qualified to make such a statement. Obviously, King is a prolific writer who has seen much success in his career (on a side note, if there are any struggling writers out there, you should really read King's own account of his days as an almost-starving teacher with a family who never gave up hope...it's really inspiring.) But a critics' darling, Mr. King is certainly not. He is clearly an imaginative storyteller, capable of creating characters and plots which resonate with his readers, but I am not sure if the literary intelligentsia considers his work seminal. I know that I like his novels and will always read them. This is because even if I don't like his writing per se, I almost always like his stories.
To be honest, I am not sure there is such a thing as a "good" writer. There are certainly successful writers and not--so-successful writers and writers of great acclaim and those who garner little regard. But, there hasn't always been a direct correlation between those who are the best with those who are the most successful. I assume the millions of people around the world who have read the Twilight series think Ms. Meyer's writing is a-ok, otherwise they wouldn't be spending mad money on her books. If you ask them, they think her stories are amazing and they feel as though they have entered in this amazing place she has created just for them. That is probably why she is earning gajillions of dollars right now. That's also probably why Mr. King does so well, despite past criticism over the quality if his writing.
As a young adult, I came across several books which resonated with me and that I was oh-so-crazy about--some were by noted writers (Austen, Steinbeck, the Bronte sisters), some, not so much (the Nancy Drew books, even Ayn Rand, who was never considered a great writer in her time). Even now, after years of being provided examples of "good" writing, I still find their stories compelling. Does it matter if Stephanie Meyer is a "good" writer if people read her books, anyway? Or, does the fact that she writes for young adults place a greater responsibility on her to write better?
What are your thoughts?
List of Fabulous things, part 1
From time to time, you will have to indulge my ringing endorsements of my favorite things. No, I am not paid to endorse them, (though I wouldn't mind a check or two...hint hint), but I like to talk about the things I like...I think its an exercise in validation-seeking. The following things are fabulous, in no particular order:
1. Snow days-just had one and I think they are nature's way of acknowledging everyone needs a mental health day from time to time.
2. Sabra Hummus-don't know what I ate before Gillie introduced me to this particular brand, but I am pretty sure I have at least one tub in my fridge at all times.
3. Siracha Sauce- affectionately called the "rooster sauce" by my mother, it turns everyday mac-and-cheese into a super spicy, clean your sinuses out comfort food extraordinaire.
4. Big Love- I am addicted and am intrigued, frightened, exasperated and impressed all at the same time by Bill Henricksen's ability to have THREE wives and their ability to not kill him or one another. (I know its fiction people, but still...three wives???)
5. Aveda Shampure-something about rosemary and mint in the morning puts a pep in my step and just makes me feel better.
1. Snow days-just had one and I think they are nature's way of acknowledging everyone needs a mental health day from time to time.
2. Sabra Hummus-don't know what I ate before Gillie introduced me to this particular brand, but I am pretty sure I have at least one tub in my fridge at all times.
3. Siracha Sauce- affectionately called the "rooster sauce" by my mother, it turns everyday mac-and-cheese into a super spicy, clean your sinuses out comfort food extraordinaire.
4. Big Love- I am addicted and am intrigued, frightened, exasperated and impressed all at the same time by Bill Henricksen's ability to have THREE wives and their ability to not kill him or one another. (I know its fiction people, but still...three wives???)
5. Aveda Shampure-something about rosemary and mint in the morning puts a pep in my step and just makes me feel better.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Stuff Desi People Like, #1--Hating on other Desis for being "too Desi"
So, the guy behind Stuff White People Like (if you haven't read the blog, you really should click on the link above) has been getting a lot of buzz lately, so much so, that I have been inspired by his commentary to start a list of Stuff Desi People Like.
As a background, I am Indian-American (dots, not feathers) and my family is originally from Gujarat. "Desi," according to Wikipedia (the most reputable of all sources, of course), "refers to the people and the culture of the Indian and South Asian diaspora." Of course, anyone who has attended a large state school (e.g. Rutgers, U of Maryland, UT, U of Florida, etc.), or worked for a tech company or in a hospital, is familiar with this term even if they are not desi as it is therefore impossible to not have met an Indian/Pakistani/Bangladeshi/Sri Lankan person. . .
So with that as the intro, here is my first observation of Stuff Desi People Like:
1. Desi people like to criticize other desis about how desi they are.
American-born desis, often referred to as ABCDs (American Born Confused Desis), love to call out non-American born desis for being FOBs (Fresh Off the Boat). Why? Because EVERY desi knows there is an acceptable amount of "desi-ness" one is allowed to embrace in this country and anything beyond that puts you in unacceptable, FOB land.
For example, its acceptable to listen to desi music (esp if its hip hop that is desi inspired, but in English), to participate in cultural shows and dance competitions in college, to have a large group of other desi friends, to be proud of being desi when movies like Slumdog do well, to say desi words with the appropriate accent in normal conversation and to visit the homeland as a young adult for spiritual awakening and thereafter claiming India is the most amazing place the world.
It is not, however, okay to bring desi food to school/work for lunch (too smelly), insist on speaking hindi/gujarati/punjabi/urdu, etc. all the time on campus or at work with your other desi friends, only having desi friends (all normal desis have at least one or two token East Asian, Jewish or white friends), or saying yaar excessively.
Any such inappropriate behavior is immediate grounds for being talked about, mimicked and compared to your parents' generation by any not-too-desi desis.
As a background, I am Indian-American (dots, not feathers) and my family is originally from Gujarat. "Desi," according to Wikipedia (the most reputable of all sources, of course), "refers to the people and the culture of the Indian and South Asian diaspora." Of course, anyone who has attended a large state school (e.g. Rutgers, U of Maryland, UT, U of Florida, etc.), or worked for a tech company or in a hospital, is familiar with this term even if they are not desi as it is therefore impossible to not have met an Indian/Pakistani/Bangladeshi/Sri Lankan person. . .
So with that as the intro, here is my first observation of Stuff Desi People Like:
1. Desi people like to criticize other desis about how desi they are.
American-born desis, often referred to as ABCDs (American Born Confused Desis), love to call out non-American born desis for being FOBs (Fresh Off the Boat). Why? Because EVERY desi knows there is an acceptable amount of "desi-ness" one is allowed to embrace in this country and anything beyond that puts you in unacceptable, FOB land.
For example, its acceptable to listen to desi music (esp if its hip hop that is desi inspired, but in English), to participate in cultural shows and dance competitions in college, to have a large group of other desi friends, to be proud of being desi when movies like Slumdog do well, to say desi words with the appropriate accent in normal conversation and to visit the homeland as a young adult for spiritual awakening and thereafter claiming India is the most amazing place the world.
It is not, however, okay to bring desi food to school/work for lunch (too smelly), insist on speaking hindi/gujarati/punjabi/urdu, etc. all the time on campus or at work with your other desi friends, only having desi friends (all normal desis have at least one or two token East Asian, Jewish or white friends), or saying yaar excessively.
Any such inappropriate behavior is immediate grounds for being talked about, mimicked and compared to your parents' generation by any not-too-desi desis.
The Container Store
Last night, my husband took me to the Container Store. It was one of my favorite dates, EVER.
For those of you who are unfamiliar, the Container Store is the be-all, end-all of organization shopping. Organization shopping is as therapeutic for me as a hot bath, a long run, or a six pack is for other people. Why, you ask? Because I generally have no control over anything I do at work, or over the people in my life (damn free will) or the state of the world, but I can control how I store my sweaters, where I keep my out-of-season clothing and whether I hang pants lengthwise, by the waist, or in half over a hanger.
To me, nirvana is a home in which everything I own has a home. Shelves for books, wall organizers for mail, hooks for pajamas, a pantry system for dry goods--you name it, I want it. The idea of a closet with enough room for all of my handbags (a topic for another post), scarves, clothing, shoes AND enough space for me to evenly space all of my hangers (a topic for yet another post) is enough to get me all tingly inside. So, when we put in an offer in on a house in which there was not one, but TWO master, WALK IN closets, priority number one for me was to finally design the closet of my dreams.
In the past 11 years, I have moved something like 12 times. It's ridiculous, I know, but I know I am not alone in this---most of my friends have moved as much, if not more. I would start off with the best intentions in each new place---organized closets, cupboards, drawers. And in time, I would realize I needed more shelving or more hooks and by then, it would be 6 months into a one year lease and I just decided it wasn't worth it. But now that I am a for-real grown up, with a for-real house, I can do whatever I want and invest as much as I want because we aren't going anywhere anytime soon. So after years of dreaming about walk in closets, garages and a kitchen pantry of my very own...I finally have them and you better believe, I am pimping them out...
And there is no better place to pimp out your closet than the Container Store. After two hours of working with our very own design consultant, my husband and I walked away with hundreds of thousands of dollars worth shelves, drawers, hanging rods. And a feeling that by customizing our home, we are customizing our life and taking charge of our little corner of the world. We can't control what happens when we walk out the door, but when we walk in---we are in a place where everything is exactly how we want it and where we want it...too bad can't run the rest of the world the same way...
Since we do finally have all the time in the world to get settled in, I plan on savoring every part of putting away my clothes in my new closet and imagine myself spending a lot of time in there, just staring at the wonderment that is organization!!!
For those of you who are unfamiliar, the Container Store is the be-all, end-all of organization shopping. Organization shopping is as therapeutic for me as a hot bath, a long run, or a six pack is for other people. Why, you ask? Because I generally have no control over anything I do at work, or over the people in my life (damn free will) or the state of the world, but I can control how I store my sweaters, where I keep my out-of-season clothing and whether I hang pants lengthwise, by the waist, or in half over a hanger.
To me, nirvana is a home in which everything I own has a home. Shelves for books, wall organizers for mail, hooks for pajamas, a pantry system for dry goods--you name it, I want it. The idea of a closet with enough room for all of my handbags (a topic for another post), scarves, clothing, shoes AND enough space for me to evenly space all of my hangers (a topic for yet another post) is enough to get me all tingly inside. So, when we put in an offer in on a house in which there was not one, but TWO master, WALK IN closets, priority number one for me was to finally design the closet of my dreams.
In the past 11 years, I have moved something like 12 times. It's ridiculous, I know, but I know I am not alone in this---most of my friends have moved as much, if not more. I would start off with the best intentions in each new place---organized closets, cupboards, drawers. And in time, I would realize I needed more shelving or more hooks and by then, it would be 6 months into a one year lease and I just decided it wasn't worth it. But now that I am a for-real grown up, with a for-real house, I can do whatever I want and invest as much as I want because we aren't going anywhere anytime soon. So after years of dreaming about walk in closets, garages and a kitchen pantry of my very own...I finally have them and you better believe, I am pimping them out...
And there is no better place to pimp out your closet than the Container Store. After two hours of working with our very own design consultant, my husband and I walked away with hundreds of thousands of dollars worth shelves, drawers, hanging rods. And a feeling that by customizing our home, we are customizing our life and taking charge of our little corner of the world. We can't control what happens when we walk out the door, but when we walk in---we are in a place where everything is exactly how we want it and where we want it...too bad can't run the rest of the world the same way...
Since we do finally have all the time in the world to get settled in, I plan on savoring every part of putting away my clothes in my new closet and imagine myself spending a lot of time in there, just staring at the wonderment that is organization!!!
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